Guy to girl: Just because I slept with you doesn't mean we get to be Facebook friends!
Girl, in Southern accent: Oh, shoot!
–14 St & Ave B
Overheard by: Obducomiapint
Guy to girl: Just because I slept with you doesn't mean we get to be Facebook friends!
Girl, in Southern accent: Oh, shoot!
–14 St & Ave B
Overheard by: Obducomiapint
Girl #1: I cant believe you made out with him!
Girl #2: Why?
Girl #1: He's not even your type!
Girl #2: What do you mean? He's exactly my type!
Girl #1, exasperated: He has Asperger's!
Girl #2, matter of factly: Exactly!
–Union Square
Guy: I'm hanging with Ray tonight. You know Ray?
Girl: Yeah, I know him! I used to sit on his face!
–4 Train
Overheard by: Rocco
20-something chick: What's a good man gift?
20-something friend: Full frontal nudity.
–Rockefeller Plaza
Girl, drawing: Should her shoes be open-toed or close-toed?
Boy: Close-toed. Like ballet shoes.
Girl, seriously: You mean platform ballet shoes?
Boy: There's no such thing as platform ballet shoes. You can't do ballet in platforms. This is why disco died, Anne. Everybody fell over.
–Midtown
Overheard by: Sunny
Guy to girl smoking cigarette: Didn't your mother tell you smoking is bad for you?
Girl: Didn't your mother tell you never to talk to strangers?
–181st & Broadway
Girl #1: That's a tourist bus!
Girl #2: Yeah, well… we're tourists!
Girl #1, after long sigh: We're from Long Island!
–E 14 St & 1st Ave
Overheard by: holly
Man on phone: Wait, so she bit you? Dude! Wait, what? She punched you? Oh, you went to punch her? Dude, you punched her?
–Penn Station
Too young for final stage alcoholism guy: I totally held my own. I knocked the girl out and fucked the guy up.
–10th St & Ave A
Gangster: Next time I see him, I'ma kick him in his good leg.
–Uptown F Train
Softball-player-looking girl to friends: If you ever wear a tiara at your wedding, I'm going to punch you in the face.
–Wagner Park
Overheard by: mclaire
Young mother to others: Yeah, but you hafta be careful. You can't just hit your kids in public.
–Rivington & Essex
Overheard by: verbal abuse ftw!
Boyfriend to girlfriend: But if I punch you in the throat you will stop breathing.
–SoHo
Teen girl: Did you see that? I almost punched Ira's glass in the chest! That was awesome!
–AMC Theater, 19th St & Broadway
Overheard by: Katie
Lady with no teeth to bathroom attendant: I love your sparkly eyeshadow! The doctor who did my second abortion had the same eyeshadow!
–Public Restroom, Bryant Park
Overheard by: Slydell
Girl on cell: I would rather have diabetes than get an abortion.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: Kári Emil
Asian hipster girl: Abortion, abortion, abortion, Aids!
–NYU Dorm
Overheard by: i'll take the next elevator
Teen on cell: I've never been a fan of abortion, but if we could just make this little mistake go away.
–Penn Station
Hipster girl to friends: I mean, I think it should be a choice. Like, I'm not pro-abortion. Actually, I am pro-abortion. I think we should all have been aborted. Our parents made the wrong choice.
–2 Train
Guy on cell: I've pooped in the bushes and an abortion clinic, but never on the floor.
–The Gate, Park Slope
Overheard by: Nathan
Girl #1: Um, do I smell bad? Nobody has sat next to me in a while and this train has been overcrowded for the past ten blocks.
Girl #2: Yeah… you kind of do, actually.
–Q Train
