Girl: So I swept everything into a pile and I walked away for like, a second, and when I come back this little Mexican girl and her mom are seriously dancing in this pile of garbage and totally fucking up my sweeping. Why would anyone do that?!
Guy: Dude, they were Mexican. Garbage is like water to them.
–Urban Outfitters
White chick to black chick: That’s a cute bag. It would be, if it were real.
Black chick: Bitch, it ain’t fake, it’s stolen!
–14th & 8th
Girl #1: I love a little ethnicity…in the penis!
Girl #2: Totally, I heart the foreigners. The best I’ve ever had was a Frenchie.
Drunk guy: What? Hold on. You fucked a scrunchie?
–Houston & A
Black teen girl #1: Ashley is pissing me off. Do you know what she wants me to do this weekend?
Black teen girl #2: No, what?
Black teen girl #1: Pick apples!
Black teen girl #2: Is she white?
Black teen girl #1: No, that’s what pisses me off, she’s black!
Black teen girl #2: Shit, I don’t know about apple picking, but this weekend, I’m gonna do some jerk chicken pickin’!
–A train to Manhattan
Overheard by: Johnny Appleseed
Yarmulke guy: Bush fascista, se tenemos ser la lista! Bush fascista, se tenemos ser la lista!
Woman: Do you think he’s Orthodox?
Man: He’s Orthodox crazy.
–G train
Overheard by: quitecontrarian
Teen girl: Hi. Yes, hi. Excuse me. I know you don’t know me but, what background are you from?
Teen boy: Ummm, why do you ask?
Teen girl: You look like an interesting mix and I really really want to know.
Teen boy: Ummm. Actually, I don’t know.
Teen girl: You don’t know? How come?
Teen boy: I was adopted.
Teen girl: Really? Wow! I don’t know my real parents either! Ok, ok. That’s not true. I just wanted to fit in.
–F train
Asian guy: If I’da been white, they would have let me in. White people suck.
White guy: White people don’t suck; clubs suck. I try to limit myself to venues that always let me in, but still encourage easy white women to come too. So far, I have yet to get an STD that can’t be cured.
–F train
Asian chick #1: The thing is, he’s a Jewish guy? And like, ya know, a lot of Jewish guys are in to Asian girls?
Asian chick #2: Yeah?
Asian chick #1: Yeah. I think it’s like because, like, both cultures are so, like, into family? Like Jews are really into family and Asians are really into family?
Asian chick #2: Yeah.
Asian chick #1: But also? I think he kind of has an Asian fetish?
Asian chick #2: I hate that.
Asian chick #1: Yeah. He’s like…ya know. A nerdy Jewish guy who likes to date Asian girls?
Asian chick #2: Yeah.
Asian chick #1: Yeah, but he’s really cute in that way that he’s nerdy but he loves Asian girls?
Asian chick #2: Yeah.
–N/R 8th street station
Megaphone lady: Don’t buy from Canada! Don’t go to Canada! Don’t support Canada at all!…Don’t buy Canadian beer!
–49th & 6th
Queer #1: So when he showed up I was surprised because he was kinda gangsta.
Queer #2: Ok, so what’s wrong with that?
Queer #1: Well, I guess I should have expected it because his profile said he was from the Bronx… but I mean you can still be from the Bronx and be Americanized.
–Union Square East
