Guy: [something in Spanish]… how do you say “altar boy”? You know, the ones whose little dicks the priest sucks?
–7th & Ave A
Overheard by: Jenny B
Guy: [something in Spanish]… how do you say “altar boy”? You know, the ones whose little dicks the priest sucks?
–7th & Ave A
Overheard by: Jenny B
Woman: Honey, no matter how rich we get, I refuse to move to California.
Man: Why?
Woman: Because I refuse to have a spoiled brat for a child! I would want to raise them in New York.
Man: If we’re rich, won’t they be spoiled either way?
Woman: Yeah, but I’d rather have a Hamptons brat than an OC brat.
–Regal Cinemas Union Square
Overheard by: Tina L
A little boy is eating a chocolate Easter bunny.
Mom: Don’t eat too much of that. You’ll get diarrhea.
Little boy: But I like diarrhea.
–4 train
Overheard by: Patrick Di Justo
Suit on cell: Yo man, it’s Wednesday, are you ready to go get drunk and nail some bitches?… Hold on… What the fuck? I’m just in a manic rage and I want to destroy everything. What’s so wrong with that, Dad?
–13th between 3rd & 4th
Little girl, pointing: Jewish people!!
Mom: Shhh.
–F train
Crazy guy: Ain’t you people heard of the Treaty of Versailles? I gots mothafuckin’ rights, mothafuckas!
NYU tour guide: Washington Square Park is the vibrant center of campus…
Crazy guy: Rights! You can’t just be dropping mustard gas on me, like that mothafucka from Tennessee be doin’. The Treaty of Versailles says I got rights!
Tour mom: Oh my god! They have mustard gas here now? I told you this city wasn’t safe.
Crazy guy: This bitch understands that I got rights!
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Laura Mathis
Dude: I’ve fired 3 people in the last 2 weeks. One girl was fat. But she didn’t know it. She would come into work with her belly falling out of her shirt. I just couldn’t take it anymore.
–NYSC, 38th & Broadway
Overheard by: Aimee
Teacher lady: Kids, kids…Quiet! Remember, no one else on this train likes children!
–F train
Overheard by: Erin Schulte
Dad: I may not be able to drive you to the sleepover at Joey’s father’s house on Friday. It’s in the opposite direction and there won’t be time. What we maybe can do is drop you off there Saturday morning. And we can have pizza ourselves, Friday night, instead. Would that work?
Little boy: It’s a distinct possibility…
–R train
Little boy: Mom, is South America a continent?
Mom: Well, it’s…there’s North America and South America.
Little boy: Yeah, is South America a continent?
Mom: Uh, no. No, it’s not a continent, it’s…Um…
–St. Marks Place
