Guy: Hey, you’re limping! Did you run the marathon or something?
Gal: No, I fell doing a kegstand.
–Greenwich & Charles
Guy: Hey, you’re limping! Did you run the marathon or something?
Gal: No, I fell doing a kegstand.
–Greenwich & Charles
Older guy: What time is it?
Younger guy: Tuesday.
Translated from the Spanish.
–91st & Columbus
Overheard by: Jane T.
Thug #1: Your mom is a lady, bro.
Thug #2: I don’t want to hear no more of this shit. Go fuck her in the ass. Go fuck her in the ear. I don’t want to hear it.
Thug #1: No, dawg. She a WOMAN.
Thug #2: Fuck you, I said stoppit.
Thug #1: I know you smart. I know you smart. But she is a lady.
–61st and CPW
Overheard by: Lauren Michelle
Tourist #1, about Hasidic Jewish guys wandering around: Look!
Tourist #2: Huh?
Tourist #1: Wanna go talk to the Jews?!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Lynn
NYU guy #1: But wait, doesn’t Fidel Castro own the Dallas Mavericks?
NYU guy #2: No, no, you’re thinking of Mark Cuban.
NYU guy #1: Oh. What a coincidence.
NYU guy #2: Um, not really.
–Waverly Pl
NYU girl #1: I have so much work due in this next week that it’s not even funny. I kind of want to kill myself.
NYU girl #2, glancing around: Don’t say things like that. People actually take you seriously around here.
–Starbucks, Washington Sq Park
Overheard by: prospective nyu student … or not
Hipster #1: I’m really into Bossa Nova.
Hipster #2: I like her, too! What was the name of her hit song? The one that goes [starts humming]
–Yuppietown
Guy: You know it was just like…
Girl: Yeah…
–88th & 2nd
Girl #1: I keep all my money in that piggy bank you gave me.
Girl #2: Piggy bank?
Girl #1: Actually it was a bear, wasn’t it? I save my money in that piggy bear.
–7 train
Mom: You’re the mommy.
Little boy: I’m not the mommy.
Mom: You’re the mommy.
Little boy: I am not the mommy.
Mom: You’re the mommy.
Little boy, screaming: I am not the mommy!
–Little Italy grocery
Overheard by: should i be taking parenting notes?
