Jamaican woman: Oh mahn, I used to get so high and den turn on dat Spanish channel so loud and just sit in front of it and listen.
–34th & 8th
Overheard by: Future NYer
Jamaican woman: Oh mahn, I used to get so high and den turn on dat Spanish channel so loud and just sit in front of it and listen.
–34th & 8th
Overheard by: Future NYer
Drunk girl: I’ve never been above ground before.
Dude: Where are you going?
Drunk girl: 96th and Park.
Dude: We’re in Queens right now. Queens is not where you want to be.
–N train
Overheard by: Brandi Brown
Guy: Dad, you had to see this broad; she must have been 200 to 250.
Dad: Like you’re some prize. You are 40, divorced, have 3 kids and live at home with your parents.
–68th & York
Overheard by: Anthony DiGangi
Little girl: Mommy, what’s this?
Mom: Japanese art. You know, like in Mulan.
–The Met
Crazy lady: Yo! Uh…man!
Hot dog guy: Yes?
Crazy lady: Why aren’t you serving me?
Hot dog guy: I just placed your order, ma’am.
Crazy lady: Well I used to work in immigration, so you best be doing that shit quick like right? Shit, I was immigration, okay? I know people, all right?
Hot dog guy: Like who?
Queer: Kenneth Cole?
Crazy lady: No! I know Diedre. Now don’t be playing these crazy mindgames with me! I’m prepared. I have a gun.
Hot dog guy: That’s very nice. That’ll be 5.98 total, ma’am.
Crazy lady: Fuck you. I’m gone now. You can’t see me!
Queer: Faggot, just go away.
–Papaya King, 86th & 3rd
Overheard by: Ben Bleiberg
Guy #1: I met this girl, she was perfect.
Guy #2: Whaddya mean?
Guy #1: She was like a mannequin.
Guy #2: Interesting concept…
–77th & Lexington
Overheard by: Jules Cattie
Dad: Could you tell me where the auditorium is?
Security guy: It’s on the second floor.
Dad: Wait, you mean it’s actually in the building?
–Hunter College High School, 94th & Park
Girl: Do you all have a financial planner? I think it’s very important.
Guy: I didn’t go to Harvard Business School just to let some guy from Cornell manage my money.
–Artisanal, Park Avenue
Overheard by: Swirve
Professor guy: Remember, next week’s exam will cover all the material from the past three weeks.
Chick: Uh, ‘scuse me? When are we going to get to the Zodiac signs?
Professor guy: Um, you do know this is astronomy and not astrology, right?
–Hunter College
Overheard by: Hello Clairice
Tween boy #1: Fine, fine. I’ll buy you a BLT. How ’bout that?
Tween boy #2: A BLT? I’m Jewish, you idiot.
Tween boy #1: Oh, whatever. I see you eat a BLT every day, liar.
–64th & Park
Overheard by: Andrea C.
