Mother: Katie, why did you punch Audrey?
Young girl: Um, because she didn’t want to fight with me.
–15th St & Prospect Park West, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Gary Wax
Mother: Katie, why did you punch Audrey?
Young girl: Um, because she didn’t want to fight with me.
–15th St & Prospect Park West, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Gary Wax
Out-of-breath Star Wars fan: Hey, do you know where the 3 pm light saber fight will take place?
Bored security officer: I dunno, but it should be over there. That’s where all the weird Jedis are hanging out.
–Big Apple Comic Book Convention, Penn Plaza Pavilion
Overheard by: PoisonIvy
Middle-aged Latino woman to younger black woman: Listen, I got rights, ok? I mean I’ll do the time for it, I don’t care. On this train you gotta give people respect, ’cause everyone’s a person. You give ’em respect, then you punch ’em.
–M train
Twentysomething girl on cell: Because I beat the crap out of him, that’s why I got fired.
–Continental Ave & Austin St, Forest Hills
Overheard by: Sean Finnerty
Lady: I was fighting with this guy and his dog was in the room; that dog bit me.
–Cobble Hill
Overheard by: d.luxxe
Chick: I’m gonna beat that girl like she never went to school.
–77th & 3rd
Girl #1: Um, excuse me? Excuse me?…Excuse me, I need to get out here…Excuse me, I need to get out here.
Girl #2: Don’t fucking push me!
Girl #1: I said “excuse me,” you stupid fucking bitch! And by the way, your music sucks!
–L train
Overheard by: Lilit
Girl #1: Ooh, if he was black he would have kicked your ass…
Girl #2: Yeah, if he was a nigga you’d be bleeding all over me.
–1 train
Overheard by: Dustin Ragland
Guy #1: That guy from the Red Sox is over there.
Girl: Which one?
Guy #1: The one who just quit.
Girl: No way! Let’s fuck with him.
Guy #2: Watch out, he’s from Boston and he looks pissed.
Guy #1: No, we should piss on his shoes!
–Times Square
Overheard by: coma toast
A hobo has a cardboard sign that says “Ninjas killed parents, need money for Kugn [sic] Fu lessons.”
A cop comes up, and the hobo says: I don’t know why. I’ve already had five police come by and bother me today.
–14th & 5th
Overheard by: Casey
(cf. This guy.)
