Girl: I met this guy last summer… He was French…
Guy: That means he was gay?
–1 train
Overheard by: olga torrey
Girl: I met this guy last summer… He was French…
Guy: That means he was gay?
–1 train
Overheard by: olga torrey
Girl: Oh, has your ear been penetrated?
Boy: It’s called ‘pierced,’ Maddie, not ‘penetrated.’ Pierced.
–Central Park
Girl #1: She’s such a fucking bitch.
Girl #2: She’s such a motherfucking bitch.
Girl #1: Yeah, but she’s hot.
Girl #2: Yeah, she’s really fucking hot.
–7th & Ave A
Girl #1: Oh, look, they have yoga.
Girl #2: Yeah, but it’s all ‘Breathe in, breathe out.’ I hate that shit.
–Shake Shack line, Madison Square Park
Overheard by: Jacqui
Female clerk: Do we have Skinny Bitch down here?
Queer clerk: Oh, I don’t know. What does she look like?
Female clerk: It’s a book.
Queer clerk: Oh, we have books here, too.
–Barnes & Noble
Puerto Rican girl #1: I really hate the way she eats.
Puerto Rican girl #2: Yeah, but she’s Jamaican. You know how they are.
–Bergen St, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Dumbfounded
Headline by: Gutterlush
Runners-Up:
· “At Least She Isn’t Dominican.” – Jon
· “Even Their Chickens Are Jerks.” – Howard Bannister
· “Psychic?” – Beryl
· “Racism! It’s What’s For Dinner” – Goldielox
· “You’re Just Jealous You Can’t Use Your Dreads As a Fork” – Chels
Girl #1: Oh my god, my roommate is so weird. She keeps farting, but I don’t smell anything.
Girl #2: She must be anorexic.
Girl #1: True! I didn’t think of that. I’m so glad I’m friends with someone that got a scholarship!
–Starbucks, 51st & Broadway
Overheard by: Or she’s bullemic.
Teen daughter: So, is this what you saw?
Mother: What?
Teen daughter: Is this what you saw when you took estrogen?
–Summer of Love: Art of the Psychedelic Era, Whitney Museum
Overheard by: flowerchild
JAP mom, looking at diorama of Neanderthals: Amanda was taking pictures of them before…
JAP daughter: It must be her goal weight.
–Museum of Natural History
Guy to friend: Yo! I’m mad hungry! I want some anus! [Passengers stare.] … Awww, shit! I meant that shit from McDonald’s — angus! Angus!
–4 train
Enthusiastic queer: This train smells like McDonald’s! Someone’s being a chubby chicken!
–Queens-bound N train
Overheard by: Onion
Hobo: Just so you know, they don’t got liquor stores in heaven. They don’t got no McDonald’s, neither.
–1 train
Overheard by: Galen
Girl on cell: He’s obsessed with America’s Next Top Model… And he watches What Not to Wear… What? No… Mom, he said that McDonald’s fries are his weakness, but they go straight to his thighs! How much gayer do you need him to be?!
–Pratt Institute
Mom to crying kid in stroller: Well, if you don’t want McDonald’s, I don’t know what I can get you.
–207th & Broadway
