Girl: What are you doing tonight?
Guy: I gotta help a buddy at his new house. We’re gonna get some beer and fix his basement steps.
Girl: You really think that’s a good idea, drinking and repairing stairs?
Guy: Nah, I’m just kidding. We’re actually installing a new toilet.
–7 train
Overheard by: Danielle
Guy: Those accents are hot! Where you guys from? New Zealand? Australia or somethin’?
British girl #1: Ugh! I never!
British girl #2: How could confuse a London accent for Australia, of all places?
–BLVD, The Bowery
Overheard by: E Diddy
Guy: I was reading the script, trying to figure out which part to read for the audition, but they're all so…
Girl: Disturbed?
Guy: Right! Like, my first thought was the albino dwarf, but he's planning to kill someone, so… obviously not.
–68th & 2nd
Overheard by: ultra-condensed movies
Girl #1: Is that cum?
Girl #2: Yes, green cum.
–W 47th & 5th
Overheard by: Holly
Slacker chick in Heidi haircut, Mao cap and gas station jacket: What really pissed me off was we were fooling around one night and he was texting another girl. I’m, like, sitting there naked, ready to do whatever, and he’s pulling that shit. He’s all about wanting to eat out my asshole, and then he does that.
Slacker dude: I guess he wasn’t really ready to get everything he wanted.
–Raccoon Lodge, TriBeCa
Overheard by: Nic
Girl in short skirt: Hey, that hobo just whistled at me!
Girl in tight pants: Ohmigod, he totally whistled at me like five minutes ago!
Girl in short skirt: Maybe he has something caught in his throat?
Girl in tight pants: No, I think were just really hot.
–Pond Bench, Central Park
Overheard by: A Person with Ears
Eastern European girl: Jimmy* is a dirty boy.
Asian girl: Really? Why is Jimmy a dirty boy?
Eastern European girl: He said dirty things to me online.
Asian girl: He said dirty things to you online? Like what?
Eastern European girl: I don’t want to talk about it right now.
Asian girl: Does he make you uncomfortable?
Eastern European girl: Yeah, sometimes he does — like, when he tells me to send him pictures of myself with my shirt off.
Asian girl: Does it make you scared?
Eastern European girl: No, I just don’t have any pictures of myself with my shirt off.
Asian girl: Then why don’t you take some?
Eastern European girl: I don’t know.
Asian girl: You know what? I’ll help you. I’ll go to your house right now and take some pictures of you with your shirt off, and then you can send them to Jimmy, okay?
Eastern European girl: Okay.
–Downtown 6 train
Girl #1, looking at notebook her friend gave her: Hey, that's a cool notebook!
Girl #2: It's yours, silly!
Girl #1: Oh, yeah!
–City College of New York
Overheard by: Just chilling around..
Young girl: I want to sit over there! (points to occupied seat)
Pregnant mother: Girl, if I wasn't holding a baby in, I'll piss all over you.
–E Train
Overheard by: was sitting next to her…
