Dumb #20-something #1: Anyway, she said something great at the end of the episode. It was like…a saying. It goes like, “Those who can't teach…” No. “Those who can't do…” No. Am I right? “Those who can't teach…do…”
Dumb #20-something #2: Yes, you are so right. It's: “Those who can't teach, do.” I know that.
Dumb #20-something #1: Yeah. I mean, I just… (very quietly), I just really related to that sentence.
–35th St & 8th Ave
Overheard by: Dan
Math professor: This weekend I saw an exhibit at the Staten Island Zoo about dinosaurs.
Blonde bimbette: You mean with real dinosaurs?
–College of Staten Island
Tourist #1: Oooh, let’s go in here!
Tourist #2: That’s a bank, you moron.
–Bank of America, Times Square
Overheard by: Allisa
Girl #1: I am so wasted. I got molested by some Mexican at this sleepover party thing.
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: Yeah, I woke up and everyone was fighting cause he touched my boobs. I think there’s some law saying that you can’t molest someone while they’re sleeping.
Girl #2: Actually, I think there’s a law saying you can’t molest someone, period.
–Stuyvesant High School
Overheard by: if walls had ears
Southern man: What the hell is a steak free-tes?
Southern woman: Oh honey, it’s a chicken fried steak and they probably serve it with grits. This is where famous people come to eat like real human beings.
Southern man: Well hell, they should call it somethin’ more respectable than Pasties.
–Pastis, 9th & Little W. 12th
Overheard by: Jack B. Nimble
Black chick #1: So you didn’t get the job?
Black chick #2: Nah, I fucked up. I shouldn’t have told them I drank when I was younger. I really didn’t drink.
–26th & 7th
Overheard by: max
Yuppie chick #1: So, I went to the Museum of Natural History yesterday.
Yuppie chick #2: You wanted to go to the Museum of Natural History?
Yuppie chick #1: Yeah.
Yuppie chick #2: Why?
Yuppie chick #1: ‘Cause they have stuff there.
Yuppie chick #2: You know, I’ve never been to the Museum of Natural History. What kind of stuff do they have there?
Yuppie chick #1: You know, like, natural science stuff… A lot of the stuff there, though, was for little kids.
Yuppie chick #2: Yeah, I wouldn’t go there. Who wants to see natural science stuff?
Yuppie chick #1: Yeah, I mostly thought it was stupid.
–Utopia Diner, 72nd & Amsterdam
Overheard by: Cultured New Yorker
Blonde girl: What time is it?
Guy: Quarter to eight.
Blonde girl: (looking confused)
Guy: It's seven forty-five.
–7th & Ave A
Girl #1: I don’t know if my sister is a lesbian or not.
Girl #2: I thought she was.
Girl #1: Yeah, but the other day some guy was like, oh yeah, your sister dated Nick for a long time, and now all I know is that she’s dating someone who makes omelettes. Omelettes are manly, right?
–Stuyvesant High School
Overheard by: djingo
Boy genius #1: What birds can’t fly?
Boy genius #2: Polar bears.
Boy genius #1: No, polar bears can fly.
–Columbia University
