Kids

Seven-year-old girl pointing at a spinal column in glass case: What’s that?
10-year-old brother: It’s a snake.
Seven-year-old girl: No way… No, it’s not…
10-year-old brother: Yes, it is. It lives inside you. If you make it mad, it eats your brain.

–Bodies exhibit, South St Seaport

Overheard by: snakebite

Child: The man-of-war is in a black suit, right?
Father: It's not an actual man.

–Museum of Natural History

Overheard by: Harmony Yourish

Father: You see, girls, there is an election coming up, and so far we have only had boring white men. This time we could have a black man or a woman as our president!
Four-year-old daughter: But Daddy, we’re white!
Father: Yes, but we aren’t boring.

–Metro-North train

Overheard by: Emily

Girl: Mum, I can’t get through.
Mum: Honey, I’ve told you before, you have to push and shove past the people otherwise you’ll never get through.

–Rockefeller Center

Male cop: My brother got taken in for rape this morning. To jail.
Female cop: Yeah, one of my kids was arrested last week.
(both laugh)

–42nd St & Park Ave

Overheard by: Lynne

Mom: Well, now we’re all going to visit Grandma.
Anxious child: No, Mommy! I don’t want to go to the hospital!
Mom: But we’re going to visit Grandma today…
Anxious child, screaming: No! I don’t want to go to the hospital! People urinate on the floor!
Mom: Everyone can hear you!

–1 train

Lady, seeing long line for toilet: What a long line! Is there anyone in the men's room? I'll use it, why not? It's the same! (Knocks on door, gets no answer. Opens door)
Lady: Woooooo! The smell!
(stands there for 30 seconds with grimace, complaining)
Poor little boy, coming out of bathroom, in shaky voice: There's… There's no one else in there.

–School, Bay Ridge, Brooklyn

Overheard by: Wallflower

Excited little girl to friend: Hey! Wanna see my room? It's really cool! I got a bed!

–Whole Foods, Tribeca

Three-year-old girl, excitedly pointing at picture on store front: Look mommy, it's Buddha! It's Buddha!

–Ave B b/w 3rd & 4th

Overheard by: EVgirl

Young girl to father: Only 1,486 days until I'm 18 and then I can do whatever the heck I want.

–E 78th St & 3rd Ave

Overheard by: Brandon F

4-year-old girl to father trying to board overcrowded train: Jesus, we should have taken the bus! I told you we should have taken the bus.

–Uptown 4 Train

Overheard by: kdice

Five-year-old son to father who just dropped BlackBerry: What the hell just happened here?

–Great Lawn, Central Park

Four-year-old girl: I'mma hustla! I'mma, I'mma hustla!

–Uptown 1 Train

Overheard by: Nina

Little boy holding a box of cupcakes: Dad, I need money.
Dad: Just run.

–Magnolia Bakery

Overheard by: Mike

Six-year-old boy: Damn, I always wanted to go in there.
Mom: No, you didn’t.

–Outside M&M Store, TImes Square

Overheard by: Lynne