Knock-Offs

Stoned girl to tourists filming and photographing ads outside M&M store: It's an advertisement, people!

–Times Square

Overheard by: Alice

Hot woman in suit to unsuspecting family buying a knock-off purse: Don't buy that shit, you stupid fucking tourists!

–44th & 6th Ave

Overheard by: would never buy that shit

NYC punk to tourist bus: Hey, tourists! Welcome to New York! {short pause} Fuck you!

–8th & Broadway

Young thug to friend: Man, if I told you once, then I be telling you a million times. You from New York, fool. In New York, you don't be going giving no tourists directions! If they say, "where's the Empire State Building at?" you spit on them and walk the other way! Now don't you go make me be telling you again! I've had enough of you and yo' foolish ways. (couple wearing "I (heart) New York" t-shirts inch away nervously)

–Union Square

Overheard by: Glad I had a map

Suit with southern accent: Nah! That library has too many tourists.

–51 & Lexington

Overheard by: Miriam

Man handing out New York Post: New York Post! If you're illiterate, only 75 cents! If you only lookin at pictures, 50 cents!

–6th Ave & W 8th St

Overheard by: lady v

Man selling cotton candy: Get your cotton candy here! Cotton candy! I got your all-natural blue fibers of sugar right here! Straight from the blue cotton fields of…Virginia! Cotton candy, here!

–Shea Stadium

Street perfume seller to browser: You like Vera Wang, princess? This is genuine Wang.

–34th & 6th

Overheard by: Weary Communter

Street vendor: Hey, where are you ladies from? (two teenage girls walk by) Oh, that's cool, that's cool, I think I have a friend that lives there!

–7th & 40th

Overheard by: Tiffany

AM New York guy: Sir, would you like a paper this morning? No? No? (shakes head and looks at the ground) I don't care. (pause) It's okay, I don't care.

–145th & St. Nich

Overheard by: sorry charlie

Fake purse salesman: Gucci makes the coochie go woo woo!

–Times Square

Woman #1: He’s kinda funky. He doesn’t bathe a lot.
Woman #2: Really?
Woman #1: Yeah, he’s an artist. Like, he wears lederhosen… Maybe that’s a bad example.

–New Pasteur Restaurant

Overheard by: Shawn

NYC woman: We’re here!
Southern tourist bimbo: Laura, I thought we were here to get cheap fake purses?
NYC woman: We are — this is Chinatown.
Southern tourist bimbo: Why are there so many Chinese people?
NYC woman, slowly: This is Chinatown…
Southern tourist bimbo: Laura! You know I hate Chinese people!

–Canal St

Overheard by: The Wizard

Little girl: Oooh, furry! Mommy, can I pet the pretty, furry lady?
Old lady wearing a pink fur: Don’t worry, I get this all the time.

–47th & 5th

Overheard by: Micaela

Bags woman: Ladies…Gucci, Prada, Louis! Ladies…
Hot dog guy: Ladies, get your Gucci hot dogs here…Prada hot dogs!

–Canal & Broadway

Overheard by: Lori