Cop: How do you say “dog” in Spanish?
Starbucks guy: Perro.
Cop: Okay. How do you say “dog” in Mexican?
Starbucks guy: Usted es un idiota.
–Starbucks, 47th & 5th
Cop: How do you say “dog” in Spanish?
Starbucks guy: Perro.
Cop: Okay. How do you say “dog” in Mexican?
Starbucks guy: Usted es un idiota.
–Starbucks, 47th & 5th
Old lady #1: Oh, how awful! You cut your dog’s ears. How horrible! How’d you like to have your ears trimmed?
Old lady #2: I would.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Robert Hall
Chick: Every time Todd talks to a girl he thinks he’s on a date.
–9th Street between 1st & 2nd
Lady: I was fighting with this guy and his dog was in the room; that dog bit me.
–Cobble Hill
Overheard by: d.luxxe
Announcement: Please do not disturb the canine dogs.
–Staten Island Ferry Terminal, Staten Island
Guy: My dog is so racist. She is scared of black people. But she also hates the black people of dogs.
Girl: What does that even mean?
Guy: Pugs.
–33rd & 8th
Girl: I heard on CNN today that this woman in France just received the first successful face transplant after she was mauled by her Labrador. They replaced like her whole nose and lips and chin or something.
Guy: Whoa.
Girl: I know!
Guy: I mean, I thought Labradors were, like, really friendly.
–19th & 8th
Overheard by: Lara P
Lady: My dog hates morbidly obese people.
Guy: That’s so cool.
Lady: I guess a fat person must’ve sat on her at the crackhouse where I found her.
–Tompkins Square Park
Girl #1: Look, that policewoman has a seeing-eye dog! Isn’t that cool?
Girl #2: Oh yeah, cool, they have them here for that anti-terrorism shit.
Cop lady: …Is she friggin’ kidding me?
–Yankee Stadium
Overheard by: Tara B
Little girl: You know who has a weird name?
Mom: You mean an unusual name?
Little girl: Yes. The librarian. Her name is Constance.
Mom: Oh, that’s an old name, like yours: Sadie.
Little girl: But they’re bringing it back. I hear a lot of people in the park say, “Come, Sadie!” Especially to golden retrievers. That’s why I’m begging you to get me a dog.
–D train
