Girl #1: Look at that painting. Is it called “hairy balls”?
Girl #2: It should be.
Girl #1: If it's not called “hairy balls,” I'm leaving.
(girl #2 goes to look, comes back)
Girl #2: Something about a baby.
Girl #1: Okay, that's it.
Girl #2: Look, there are thumbtacks near his balls. That has to suck.
Girl #1: Let's go back to the vagina room.
–MoMA
Guy: Hey, Marie, we're going this way. Yeah, Marie…I'm calling you Marie today. Today is “middle name day.”
Girlfriend, shrugging: Whatever you say, Carol.
–Canal Street Station
Man being introduced to teenager: So, what was your name ag…
Interrupting man, holding a large pamphlet: Want to stick your foot up the devil's ass?
–St. Mark's Place
Overheard by: flmngarrow
Woman being introduced to a man: You already met me, you never remember my name!
Very angry man: No, I don't know you! I'm no ordinary dummy!
–Flying Saucer Café, Brooklyn
Girl: Excuse me, do you know if there's a Bed Bath & Beyond around here?
Confused doorman: Bloody bed and be what?
–47th & 2nd, Dag Hammerskjold Towers
Overheard by: Doug Stone
Preteen girl #1: I love our names. Can you imagine if you were named something boring, like Sarah?
Preteen girl #2: I know, right?
Preteen girl #1: It's like, you call a friend and she tells you she's on the other line with Sarah and you're like “Which Sarah? A, b, c, d or e?” and she tells you, “No, Sarah R.”
Preteen girl #2: Ugh. That reminds me. I hate Sarah R.
–7th Ave, Park Slope
Woman to toddler: The devil is evil. That's why his name is spelled “d-evil”.
–Greyhound Bus
16-year old girl to 40-year-old creep: So my name is Jenny, that's Angie. My number is like, (516) 555-5555, and you can call me and us, like, anytime! We'll totally get together!
(pause)
40-year-old creep: What's your name again?
–Uptown 6 Train
Overheard by: Shira
Girl: Yes, a boob hickey is called a “bicky”. Wait. Did you say her name was Vicky?
Boy: Shut up.
Girl: Your new girlfriend is named after the hickey her dad put on her mom's vagina!
–Prince St
Overheard by: sam
Old Man: “Esmerelda”? That sounds like a witch's name.
Old Man #2: My ex-wife's name was Esmerelda…talk about a witch!
–Sweet Life Cafe, Christopher Street
