Saleslady: Where are you from?
Tourist: Kansas City.
Saleslady: There’s a city in Kansas? Like with buildings?
Tourist: Yes.
Saleslady: Tall ones?
–Macy’s
Overheard by: Evie
Saleslady: Where are you from?
Tourist: Kansas City.
Saleslady: There’s a city in Kansas? Like with buildings?
Tourist: Yes.
Saleslady: Tall ones?
–Macy’s
Overheard by: Evie
Girl: How do I cross the parade?
Cop: Get in line with the rest of the straight people.
–Pride Parade, 14th & 5th
Headline by: Steve
Runners-Up:
· “Chickens have pride, too.” – Gobbling Cock
· “Give It The Old College Try” – Paul K.
· “Maybe a Richard Gere costume” – Corydon
· “Now, Dance! And When We Stop Laughing, You May Cross.” – Andy Adelewitz
· “That, or turn queer on 6th” – Albylicious
· “The Indian and the Construction Worker Were Far More Helpful” – mercavelli
· “The only day of the year when ‘blow me’ isn’t the right answer.” – Jesse Y C
· “Unless of course you’d like to show me some hot girl on girl action.” – Adam
Child: Mommy, what’s that smell?
Mother: That’s the city, honey.
–44th & 8th
Tourist: Um, do you live here?
Teen girl: Uh, yeah.
Tourist: Oh, is that the Empire State Building?
Teen girl: You mean the big, pointy building?
Tourist: [nods]Teen girl: What the fuck do you think? [walks away] Fucking tourist.
Tourist: Thank you! [to friend] So, wait, is it the Empire State Building?
–near Union Square
Boy #1: Damn it! I forgot my iPod.
Boy #2: Don’t worry. The city is a soundtrack in itself.
–44th & Broadway
Overheard by: Liz
Guy: I might move to the South Bronx/Washington Heights. SoBro is getting gentrified.
I’d like to get there before all the hipsters move in.
–Upper West Side
Overheard by: Jess McGins
Girl: Just start saying it, they’ll think you’re cool. It’s New York.
–SoHo
Overheard by: Jess McGins
Promoter guy: This your first time at the Empire State Building?
Dude: Yeah, it is.
Promoter guy: Cool. Where are you from?
Dude: Native New Yorker.
Promoter guy: I don’t want to talk to you.
–Empire State Building
Overheard by: Adam Nathan
Tourist chick: So far the experiences have all been good!
Cop #1: How long you been here?
Cop #2: About 5 minutes?
Cop #1: You just wait…
–Rector Street 1 station
Conductor: …Transfer available here to the F, V, N, Q, R and W. Next stop: New Jersey. Stand clear of the closing doors.
–B train
Overheard by: comicgirl
Guy: Dude, I think I just farted on a model.
–Broadway & Bleecker
Overheard by: Adam Tetzloff
