12-year-old hood rat #1, taunting three 20-ish bike riders at red light: Yeah, you ride that bike.
12-year-old hood rat #2, laughing: Yeah, fuck you! Ride that bike!
Biker girl: Yep, we’re riding our bikes [light turns and they ride off].
12-year-old hood rat #3: There they go.
–Dean St & 3rd Ave
Two tween girls cross the street, dodging cars.
Tween #1: Oh my god, I can’t believe you did that! You know I don’t watch where I’m going!
Tween #2: You don’t?
Tween #1: Uh, no — every day I almost get hit by a car, and my friends always make fun of me, and my friends say, ‘Oh my god, you almost got hit by that car,’ and I say, ‘Yeah, duh, you guys know I don’t look both ways!’
–61st & Amsterdam
Two tween girls walk into Starbucks. For some reason one emits a high pitched squeal.
Tween #2: Shut up! This is a place where humans go!
–Starbucks, Astor Place
Overheard by: Scott Nybakken
Preteen Boy #1: Get her, fuck her, leave her.
Preteen Boy #2: Is that what you do?
Preteen Boy #1: Hell yeah. Teabagging.
Preteen Boy #2: Teabagging?
Preteen Boy #1: Yeah. Get in and get out. That’s teabagging.
Preteen Boy #2: Ha, ha! Teabagging!
Preteen Boy #1: Hey, how do you spell Utah?
Preteen Boy #2: U… U…
Preteen Boy #1: Tell me how to spell Utah, motherfucker!
–Smith/9th St. Station
Overheard by: Mary Phillips-Sandy
Bored tween: Hey! We should wake up early tomorrow and kill some squirrels with my slingshot!
Bored tween sister: You're not gonna kill those innocent squirrels unless they try to kill you first!
–Highland Park, New York
12-year-old girl holding plaid button-down shirt: Wow, I can't wait to be a hipster!
Dyke in similar plaid shirt: When did “dyke” become “hipster”?
–Marshall's
Overheard by: Starisla
Mother to tween daughter, smiling: So I heard you saw a porn film with Tina* and her mother?
Daughter: Yeah, we went into Bruno and decided to leave after five minuets.
Mother: What did you end up doing?
Daughter: We saw Ice Age instead.
–ShopRite
Overheard by: Carrie
Tween boy with scooter to friend with skateboard: If I died, would you take my scooter?
Friend: What?
Boy: If I died, right now, would you take my scooter, man?
–Columbus Circle
Tween to mom: But mooooooommmmmmm, I don't want to go to that school.
Mom to tween: Chris Rock's kids go there.
–Upper West Side
Overheard by: Cathy Borck
Annoying tween: Oh my god, my dad made me use this, like, Salon brand shampoo. Oh my god, look at this volume! There's nothing! (two friends nod) And, guess what? It also smells like llama spit! (two friends look confused) You want to know how I know what llama spit smells like? My dad once got spat on in the face by a llama!
–1 Train
Overheard by: Lily
