Boy 1: Hey, what was that Exodus story about the burning bush? You know, didn’t God give him something?
Boy 2: Yeah, God gave him the holy weed, and he smoked it.
–F train
Overheard by: Fareeda
Boy 1: Hey, what was that Exodus story about the burning bush? You know, didn’t God give him something?
Boy 2: Yeah, God gave him the holy weed, and he smoked it.
–F train
Overheard by: Fareeda
Queer: When I get stoned, my grundle itches.
–6 train
Overheard by: sheerah
Street vendor, gesturing to enormous bong: No, no…this one is for tobacco.
–St. Mark’s
Elderly man: People are stupid! They don’t do pot!
–R train
Stoned guy: Man, why do chip manufacturers always put the crumbs at the bottom of the bag?
–Columbia University
Overheard by: bernard black
Teenage gangsta: Yo, when I was in the shower, it totally tasted like weed. For real.
–Lafayette & Houston
Passenger: If you see a suspicious package or activity on the platform or train, don’t keep it to yourself. Tell a cop or an MTA employee or me. There might be some money or some weed in there.
–4 train
Overheard by: Mike
Long-haired dude, picking up a cigarette butt: Man, that’s not what I wanted to smoke.
–72nd & Columbus
Overheard by: clarence rosario
Guy #1: So how are you liking law school?
Guy #2: It’s really satisfying.
Guy #1: Yeah?
Guy #2: Yeah, its like a bong hit of knowledge every day.
–Lower East Side
Overheard by: Ashir
One mom to another, amidst a gaggle of small children: Tyson’s mommy has the best pot.
–Hudson & Charles
Overheard by: Matt and Mat and Jeffrey
Ghetto woman with two young children: I need a joint.
–103rd St & CPW subway station
Overheard by: danzaboi
Chick: Girl, I cannot stand living with my mom. She has this need to always be in my business. I come home from shopping, she wants to know what I bought. I mean, the other night, she was trying to tell me how to roll my weed! She was like, “You’re not doing it right.” Ugh! I’m like, “Mom, you just started doing this. Shut up, okay?”
–1 train
Overheard by: Lauren
Drunk guy: You can’t use pot! Aren’t you on an Atkins diet or somethin’?
–F train
Overheard by: braincurve
Future politician: My friend smokes weed, but he doesn’t do drugs.
–14th & Ave B
Yuppie woman: Whatever, it was just the smoking-pot equivalent of a cult.
–8th Ave, Park Slope
Hippie: Before you partake, you got to thank God for your marijuana.
–8th & Broadway
Overheard by: Glance Backer
Thug: …’cause most doctors will tell you, most doctors will actually tell you that a little marijuana is good for the baby.
Pregnant girlfriend: Really?
–14th St
Overheard by: Rationalization Whiplash
Girl #1: Having a boyfriend then just wouldn’t have fit into my schedule.
Girl #2: Which was: get up late, smoke pot, and go back to bed.
Girl #1: And watch Roswell!
—Pirates of the Caribbean 2 advance screening, the Zeigfield
Overheard by: Nick Draven
Guy: I’m in love!
Girl: Awwww.
Guy: With marijuana.
Girl: Oh.
–18th & 10th
Overheard by: John K
Queer #1: Let’s hit the discount button bins on 39th.
Queer #2: Excuse me? That boy fucked you up bad.
Queer #1: What? I love buttons.
Queer #2: You still have some of that joint?
–10th & 6th
Overheard by: isaac
White guy #1: And to make matters worse, she stole my bag of weed!
White guy #2: She told you she had herpes, and you’re worried about your weed?
–Ray’s Pizza, 8th & 51st
Girl #1: I heard Columbia Snacks is actually a pot service.
Girl #2: What, like they sell weed and stuff?
Girl #1: No, pots for dorm plants. Yeah, weed, girl. They just want to up the GPA here.
Girl #2: Huh?
Girl #1: Don’t you know weed boosts your smarts? It’s a proven fact that weed makes you dumber the day after. But it’s also proven that it makes you much much smarter the day after that.
–Columbia University
