Wednesday One-Liner's Last Dance with Mary Jane

Professor: We will talk about the JDC–the American Jewish Joint Distribution Committee. And no, they were not dispensing marijuana.

–Queens College

Overheard by: ShaniP

Trashy JAP on cell: So I told her I was selling, and that bitch was like, "Katrina, for how much?" And I was like "Oh my god, mom, it doesn't matter how much the weed is going for, all that matters is the quality!"

–7th Ave, Park Slope

Overheard by: penelope

Random stranger to teens: You want to buy some weed? Just come back to my mom's house!

–Union Square

Overheard by: Rhian

College student on cell: Mom, you've got to stop smoking so much weed. I mean, fuck!

–Time Square

Random dude on street: I got it all! Liquor, alcohol, marijuana, Chips Ahoy! I got it!

–44th & Broadway

Overheard by: Lagster

Street vendor: Prada bags, Louis Vuitton bags, Gucci bags, marijuana bags… (everyone looks over at him) Hey, I gotta make money somehow.

–Times Square

Overheard by: mary jane

Posted on August 13, 2015
All Wednesday One-Liners, Drinking & Drunk People, Family Ties, Food, Guys, History & Geography, Insults, JAPs, Knock-Offs, Midtown & Hell's Kitchen, Moms, Money & Class, Offers and requests, On Cell, One-liners, Park Slope, Queens, Queens College, School and studying, Strangers, Street, Students, Teachers/Professors, Teens, Times Square, Union Square and East Village, Vendors & Street Performers, Wednesday One-Liners, Weed, Weirdness

Yeah, Accommodating Your Capricious Food Cravings Was Really Fun

Middle aged woman: And I smoked weed, like, ever day last summer.
Daughter: I'm shocked, mom.
Middle aged woman: Oh, so you thought I was fun naturally?

–Central Park

Posted on August 5, 2015
Central Park, Families, Family Ties, Moms, Parks, Weed

Leaving Us with Exactly Nothing to Talk About

Chick #1: You should totally invite your brother to Amsterdam.
Chick #2: Can’t — my brother gave up pot to impregnate his wife.

–Bowlmor Lanes

Posted on July 25, 2015
Girls, The Village, Weed

That, and They're Grateful to Date a Black Guy

Black girl on stoop #1: What is the difference between us and white girls?
Black girl on stoop #2: They roll joints?

–16th St & Irving

Overheard by: Kristin

Posted on July 22, 2015
Black People, Brooklyn, Compare/Contrast, Girls, Questions, Race, Weed

But at Least It Wasn’t Mary Jane

Tween #1: Dude, guess what I found in my brother’s drawer?
Tween #2: Pot?
Tween #1: No, it’s so much worse. Marijuana!

–Hammerstein Ballroom

Posted on July 20, 2015
Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Tweens, Weed

A Lot of What, Now?

Girl: I’m going to be speaking Spanish for a month, and I’m going to come back and be so good at it, but then I’ll have a month before classes start and I’ll forget all of it!
Boy: That’s because you smoke a lot of weed.

–6 train

Overheard by: Veronica

Posted on July 6, 2015
Friends, On the Subway, Weed

…Pipe Wrench. What?

Employee #1 on phone: So, I’m at your apartment and I found your pipe, but I can’t find your–
Employee #2: Dude, stop… You’re on speakerphone!

–Office, 44th & Broadway

Posted on July 6, 2015
Druggies, Manhattan, Weed

We Heart Wednesday One-Liners, Now More Than Ever

Guy to friend: Oowee! Some weed and a perm! That's my perfect New York day.

–West Village

Overheard by: Joe

Conductor: Step in, stand clear…let's go New York!

–1 Train

Overheard by: Ashley Nelson

Intoxicated creepster: Are we in Manhattan? What the hell! This city is so full of New Yorkers!

–St. Mark's Place

Overheard by: Lizzzzz

Bitter man on subway: I think one summer here would cure them of any love they have for this town.

–1 Train

Passerby to surprised-looking wife, watching fight: They're fighting. It's New York, that's what people do in this city.

–City Hall

Overheard by: ascorbique & almost famous

Grinning paramedic to female tourist in shock, strapping her to backboard after she was struck by a car: Welcome to New York!

–34th St & 7th Ave

Overheard by: Mateo que Feo

Posted on July 5, 2015
Accidents, All Wednesday One-Liners, Chelsea & the Meatpacking District, Conductors, Couples, Creepsters, EMTs, Fighting and ass kicking, Friends, Gripes, Guys, Love, Men, On the Subway, One-liners, Only in New York, Public Transportation, Questions, Street, Tourists, Union Square and East Village, Wall Street, TriBeCa, South Street Seaport, Wednesday One-Liners, Weed, Weirdness, West Village

He Ended Up Buying Dinner with It.

Hobo: Hey! Spare some change for an old hippie to buy some pot!
Old lady, dropping in some change: At least someone is honest these days…

–Cental Park

Overheard by: JRay

Posted on July 3, 2015
Hobos, Money & Class, Old People, Panhandling, Weed, Women

Wednesday One-Liners Are the Idols of Millions of Suburban White Boys

Thug to friends: Look, whatever, but I have never found myself with a girl who has no face.

–Columbia University

Thug: Yo, I got a huge blunt in my pocket… Oh, wait, that’s my inhaler.

–Q train

Overheard by: djingo

Thug: Fuck that. Fuck that, nigga! If Bill Gates offered me 20 billion dollars to suck his cock, I’d swallow. Fuck.

–Brooklyn College

Overheard by: I would, too.

Thug athlete, after soccer game: You always be playin’ that shit. You play that shit here, you play that shit in basketball, you play that shit in choir…

–Prospect Park

Overheard by: this guy

Thug on cell: I don’t know where I was, but they’s Germans everywhere in this hood! They on my left, right. Damn! [Looks around anxiously] Now I know how Patton felt, son!

–14th & Driggs

Teen thug to friend: Yo, man, have you looked at a map of Manhattan? Know what that shit looks like?!

–W 79th

Overheard by: Nikki W.

Posted on June 30, 2015
About Celebrities, All Wednesday One-Liners, BJs, Dating, History & Geography, Money & Class, Stupidity, Thugs, Wednesday One-Liners, Weed

Weed