Jogging man: Well, let’s just say there’s more than one use for a pocket.
Jogging woman: Ewww! Gross!
–Prospect Park
Jogging man: Well, let’s just say there’s more than one use for a pocket.
Jogging woman: Ewww! Gross!
–Prospect Park
Suit #1: Life preservers are for pussies.
Suit #2: Yeah, I can make a flotation device out of my jeans.
Suit #1: Oh, yeah? Were you in the Navy?
Suit #2: No, I just took a water safety class. But that’s why the guys in the Navy wear bell-bottoms — so they can take their pants off without taking off their boots, so their feet won’t freeze.
Suit #3: Can you use any jeans for this?
Suit #2: Fire-resistant ones are best.
–Elevator, 61 Broadway
Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster
Girl: Leggings are not pants! Leggings are not pants! And look at the shorts on that one! I can see her butt connection.
Guy: Her crack?
Girl: No, it’s not her crack. It’s the, you know, part where it connects up underneath. I can see it!
–3rd floor bridge, Hunter College
Overheard by: Collegiate Cutie
Old lady: Take your coat off — it’s a hundred degrees in here!
Old man: Stop talking to me!
–Architectural Digest event, W 59th & 12th
Girl #1: What do you mean I’m ‘the cutest thing ever’? I’m 21! What am I, a puppy?!
Girl #2: All I meant was you wear colorful clothes and smile a lot!
–Urban Outfitters
Overheard by: Abram
College girl #1: If you have holes in your pants and it’s winter, you’re not making a fashion statement, you’re poor.
College girl #2: But she was wearing leggings under them…
College girl #1: No, I don’t care. She’s poor.
–St. John’s University
Girl picking up a sweater: This is so cute!
Friend: Ick!
Girl, pointing at a pair of jeans: Oh, I love those! They’d fit me really nicely.
Friend: Um, no.
Girl, pointing at a dress: … Is this cute?
Friend: Meh.
–Macy’s
Overheard by: SUSAN
Geek #1: Wow. You’ve got a death metal shirt on top of a death metal shirt on top of another death metal shirt!
Geek #2: No, it’s a black metal shirt on top of a death metal shirt on top of another black metal shirt!
Geek #1: Oh! It’s a sandwich!
–Grassroots, St. Mark’s Pl
Overheard by: Meli$$a
Chick: So, with my toplessness and your bottomlessness we will equal one naked person tonight?
–Harlem
Overheard by: McN
Lady suit on cell: I told her to try the site at home and she screws her face up, scoffs at me and storms off like I’d told her to go stand on the BQE naked!
–PATH train, 9th St
Overheard by: Zenana
Cool cop: She looks great when she is naked, but when she is dressed, you know, not so great.
–1 train, 96th St
Chick to friends: The way he said it was, ‘I sleep naked so if I have to get up at night to go to the bathroom, why should I put boxers on? I’ll just put a sock on it.’
–Starbucks, Times Square
Cute hipster on cell: I was so confused this morning. I woke up naked in Queens with a stripper! I was like, ‘Fuck, I guess I had a good night…’
–Clark & Henry St, Brooklyn
Drunk guy: … And she was all drunk, dancing around naked in the attic again.
–Restaurant, Waverly & MacDougal
Clerk: What about this one?
40-something woman looking at skin-tight, black leather mini dress: Hmmm… I like it, but do you have anything with a little less leather for church?
–Orchard St
Overheard by: what kind of church does she go to?
