Six-year-old girl, grabbing a Bud Light: Daddy, can I get this?
Four-year-old sister: Yeah, can I have one too, Daddy?
Dad: Not right now, but if you two are good, I’ll get you a keg later.
Mom: I’d be down for that.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Jas
Six-year-old girl, grabbing a Bud Light: Daddy, can I get this?
Four-year-old sister: Yeah, can I have one too, Daddy?
Dad: Not right now, but if you two are good, I’ll get you a keg later.
Mom: I’d be down for that.
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Jas
Asian dude to friends: So, he told me that you shouldn’t drink water after eating watermelon or else the seeds would grow in your stomach, and I was like, ‘Are you kidding me? That’s apple juice!’
–Bronx Science
Thug teen: I can’t drink soda. I drink soda, I’m drunk.
–J train
Overheard by: Jon A.
Chick: In a Snapple bottle?! How could he get it stuck in there?!
–Nostrand & Ave U
Bimbette: I wanna be a fly on the wall. You know — just an eyeball in the Kool-Aid.
–E train
Overheard by: Ashley
Black guy to scene kid: Yo, he’s got that Mountain Dew haircut.
–23rd St
Conductor: Please take all possessions, including newspapers, bags, and litter, including empty bottles of Snapple — the official drink of New York City — and enjoy what is left of your weekend.
–A train
Overheard by: Sarah
Waiter: Would you care for a glass of wine or a cocktail?
Old lady: No, thanks, we’re heavy drug users.
–Caffe Grazie, 84th & Madison
Overheard by: mom thought that was funny
Fat, old, queer biker: Can you make a gin fizz?
Bartender: What is this, prom night?
–Cafe Loup, 13th & 6th
Overheard by: JoeQ
Woman: I’m going to get some water.
Friend, pointing to basket of water bottles: How about this?
Woman: No, I don’t like that water. It’s too watery. I like Poland Spring.
–Starbucks, 43rd & 8th
20-something girl #1: Why do they call it ‘Smart Water’?
20-something girl #2: Because it has electrolytes.
20-something girl #1: But does it make you smarter?
20-something girl #2: No! Does drinking Dr. Pepper make you a doctor? I don’t think so!
–6 train
Overheard by: Moses
Queer on cell: Fiji water is so last year.
–Christopher St
Mad chick to man: And, you know, no, no! I am not going to IM you every time I’m drinking sangria!
–Nolita House, E Houston
Overheard by: amalthya
Girl: Oh my god! They have this iced tea here that’s, like, hot.
–Cosi’s, 13th & Broadway
Conductor: Good evening, everybody, and welcome to the 3:50 a.m. whiskey whistle! Were they giving away booze in New York tonight?
–LIRR, Penn Station
Overheard by: I wasn’t Drunk Though
Man: So, the officer said to me, ‘Ah, the old beer in a tube sock…’
–Judson Memorial Church, Washington Sq South
Overheard by: mrbojangles
NYU girl: Fruit punch is like fruit juice on ecstasy!
–Midtown
Overheard by: Ryan Hague
Mom to two-year-old: We’re going home now, and Mommy’s going to make a big, fat cocktail.
–Citibabes, Soho
Overheard by: wish i had a big fat cocktail
Female: I’m so thirsty I could almost drink water!
–Across from former Forward building
Overheard by: Avalanche
Chick: … And I’ve been so tired.
Dude: Maybe you should eat more.
Chick: Well, I have been drinking water.
–Post office, 52nd St
Overheard by: what what
Black guy on cell: Yea! Yea! He just called me up. I was like, "Yo, stop callin me up"… Yea!…. Yea my sister’s on crack!
–Houston & Essex
Overheard by: saywhat?
Suit: Well, I’m a drug dealer, so I have a phone for each kind: a pot phone, a coke phone, you know…
–R train
Queer on cell: Oh my God. I left the check at home. I am such a fucking idiot. I am such a FUCKING idiot! Yeah, I’ll be there at six. Ok. I’ll bring you E and orange juice.
–Bank of America, 6th Ave
Overheard by: CarrieBoo
Bum: Hey… can you spare me $20 dollars, so I can buy some crack cocaine? I mean, I’ll share it with you. I have enough for a 10 but I want a chicken head to slob on my knob while I take a hit…
–96th St Subway Station 1,2,3
Overheard by: Franco
Smooth talker: So my ex-girlfriend was a blonde Long Islander cokehead and now here I am with you. So you can see this is a real step down.
–Les Enfants Terrible, Canal & Ludlow
Overheard by: wants to meet the ex
Hipster: You OD’d? WHERE?
–14th & 6th
Bitter ex: And fuck him and his fuckin’ wooden leg that I didn’t even know he sold crack out of!
–80th & 3rd
Disgusted hipster: I mean, I only do drugs as a joke!
–14th St L station
Overheard by: Em
Girl: So I’m gonna be doing this punch thing
Guy: Oh…yeah, I heard about that. Yeah, like, that punch was making a comeback.
Girl: Oh yeah, like, punch is really trendy.
–F train
