Pissed dude on train: You know, it'd be a lot harder for people to hold the doors if they were razor sharp.
Friend: That's not funny.
Pissed dude: I'm just saying people might hold the doors less if were going to lose a limb every time.
–F Train
Pissed dude on train: You know, it'd be a lot harder for people to hold the doors if they were razor sharp.
Friend: That's not funny.
Pissed dude: I'm just saying people might hold the doors less if were going to lose a limb every time.
–F Train
British white guy with dreads: Where are we?
Girl: 34th Street.
British white guy with dreads: 34th Street? Isn't that where that miracle happened?
–34th St
Overheard by: GV
Guy #1: I mean, what’s PDA about the back of a cab?
Guy #2: Well…
Guy #1: The cab driver? Give me a break–he doesn’t count. There’s no place better to make out in than the back of a cab.
–Verizon Wireless store, 86th St
Normal guy: So, you know this guy was unarmed…
Crazy beard guy: Sure.
Normal guy: Well, needless to say, people died that night. That’s all I’m sayin’.
–12th & 1st
Overheard by: Heather
NYU guy: I'm like a centaur, if ya know what I mean.
–University & 4th St
Overheard by: sarah
Female hipster to friends: Well, vampires are the new zombies!
–147th & Convent
Thuggish straight guy to another: Oh, I'd much rather be a faggot than a demon, dawg.
–Park Ave & Spring St
Overheard by: Christopher Schulz
Interviewer, trying to convince interviewee: There's not much of a future in being an elf.
–Macy's
Italian woman, staring at guy wearing Ghostbusters t-shirt: You donta lika da ghosts?
–Meatpacking District
Overheard by: Looking for my proton pack
Loud girl to friend: Tell them you want fuckable hair! Fuckable hair!
–Astor Place
Overheard by: Bruce Lee
Girl to friend: You mean her boob-look hair puff?
–52nd St & 6th Ave
Ghetto woman to another: Why he be mooning everyone with that hairy ass?
–53rd & Lexington
Overheard by: tommy a
Man to friend: I'm Mexican, man; I was *born* with a mustache.
–Grand & Orchard
Girl, enunciatively: I support chest hair!
–Hell's Kitchen
Overheard by: DI
Guy #1: I didn't know people in Brooklyn wear Yankees caps.
Guy #2: Since when do you care about baseball?
Guy #1: I like to watch baseball when it's on.
Guy #2: When is that? After Project Runway?
–Carroll Park
Dude, looking at soups: What the hell kind of funny person puts bread in soup?
Female pal: It's Tuscan.
Dude, nodding sagely: Oh, well then.
–Park Ave & 54th
Overheard by: pumpkin
Guy: Hey, do they have vegan food here?
Girl: No, you have to rip the meat apart with your bare hands and then fuck some bitches.
–NYU Dining Hall
Headline by: Spazzy
Runners-Up:
· “After Dinner, We Invade the Roman Empire” – billsburg boy
· “And Then You Lose Your Veganity…” – Stick
· “Most Aggressive Lunch Lady–Ever” – #5 in line
· “NYU Also Provides Us with Spears and Roofies.” – presents
· “NYU’s New Wildly Popular Caveman Dining Unit” – Naked Lunch
· “Unless You’re Patrick Bateman and Want to Reverse Those” – KateNonymous
· “We’re All Lesbian Cavegirls in College” – Dariclone
Guy: You should've sat at my end of the counter. I'm rich and well hung.
Girl: You should've sat at my end. It doesn't turn people into assholes.
–Metro Diner, 100th St & Broadway
Overheard by: Beeeej
