Girl #1: My poop is like my cat’s.
Girl #2: Like pellets?
Girl #1: No, like chronic diarrhea.
Girl #2: Why don’t you take it to the vet?
Girl #1: I havn’t even taken myself to the doctor, so why would I bother going for the cat?
–Time Warner Building, Columbus Circle
Overheard by: Collegiate Cutie
Guy: If I send a guy over with a bag…how much money can you put in it?
–8th & Broadway
Overheard by: tay-no
Pharmacist: You should probably re-sign your card.
Woman: Why?
Pharmacist: Well, you signed over the magnetic strip. You’re supposed to sign over the white part down here.
Woman: Then how would the machine read my signature? That doesn’t make any sense.
Pharmacist: No, it’s a magnetic strip. It reads the information, not the signature.
Woman: I don’t think you know what you’re talking about. That’s not how the machines work. You’re a pharmacist, not an electrician.
Then the pharmacist gave up.
–Zitomer, 76th & Madison
Overheard by: Helena
Teen girl, passing poster that says “La Vigna”: Look, Mom, it says “La Vagina”!
Mom, looking at poster: People are sick.
–New Yorker Hotel, 35th & 8th
Overheard by: Hannah Banana
Girl: Oh, and in French, they say-
Guy: -I don’t care.
Girl: This date has been awful.
Guy: Shut up!
–78th & Broadway
Wannabe cartographer: There are two Washington DCs. One is in the upper corner of the map, and the other is like forty-five minutes away from Maryland.
–Wall Street
Overheard by: notna
Shrewd observer: Why does everything in this park look like genitalia?
–Battery Park
Overheard by: Rina
Man: Wow, you speak good English. Where are you from?
Asian girl: Australia.
Man: Do they speak English there?
–1 train station
Teen girl #1: I just don’t understand why people wait so long to have kids. Then you’re so old that you can’t relate to them. If I’d had a kid when I was like, eleven, he’d have been three by the time I was fourteen.
Teen girl #2: Yeah. I totally read something about this on your LiveJournal.
–Yaffa Cafe, St. Mark’s Place
Overheard by: Miriam
Guy, pushing on the door between cars: Can you not go between cars when it’s moving?
Old lady: It’s not the subway. You have to pull.
Guy pulls hard on the handle.
Old lady: Turn and pull.
Guy, passing through the door, shouts back loudly over his shoulder: So I push the next one?
–Metro-North, Harlem Line
