Guy #1: Don’t throw away that Gatorade bottle! I gotta do something.
Guy #2: …Right now?
Guy #1: Yeah!
Guy #2: There’s a pizza place right there!
Guy #1: They won’t let me use theirs! Don’t you throw that bottle away!
–25th & 2nd
Guy #1: Don’t throw away that Gatorade bottle! I gotta do something.
Guy #2: …Right now?
Guy #1: Yeah!
Guy #2: There’s a pizza place right there!
Guy #1: They won’t let me use theirs! Don’t you throw that bottle away!
–25th & 2nd
Businessguy: It’s a small world.
Businesschick: Especially in Astoria!
Businessguy: Ha, ha, ha!
Businesschick: Hee, hee.
–Midtown office
Man: You look like someone I knew in college.
Hot lady suit: Oh, yeah?
Man: Where did you go to school?
Hot lady suit: BMCC.
Man: I went to Queens.
Hot lady suit: I did, too, for a while.
Man: Oh, my name is Eric. So, are you single?
Hot lady suit: Sometimes.
Man: Oooh.
–V train
Overheard by: Black White Woman
Guy: We have to figure out a way to get rid of her bird.
Girl: I hate birds like that. They’re full of secrets and dust.
Guy: And lice and opinions.
–13th & A
Promoter guy: Come see a great comedy show tonight! The tickets are just $5!
Chick: I can’t, I have to study.
Promoter guy: Oh come on, you don’t have to study.
Chick: I actually do, sorry.
Promoter guy: Studying will never get you anywhere.
Chick: Yeah, I’ll remember that next time I’m selling $5 tickets in the snow.
–West 3rd and Sullivan
Overheard by: sarahbelle
Girl: I didn’t know my brother was going to be at the party! And he was in a sarong!
–Park Ave S & E 25th
Guy on cell: No, no. You can wear hats on the internet.
–Smith & Wyckoff, Cobble Hill
Kid presses call button on commuter hotline phone.
Father: Why did you do that?
Son: I’m sorry. I didn’t know what it was.
Father: If you do that again the police will arrest you.
Son: Really?
Father: Yes, George Bush will come and take you to jail.
Son: What?
Father: He will kill you and put your picture on the Wall of Memories [Ground Zero feature].
–World Trade Center PATH station
Guy #1: Last summer I was hangin’ out in Richmond for a weekend and me and some other people were havin’ a party and someone gave me and this girl a pill and told us it was painkillers.
Guy #2: Oh yeah? Sounds like…fun.
Guy #1: Well the next day, after we had had sex in a pool in front of like 30 people for about 10 hours, the girl who told us it was painkillers told us it was actually Cialis.
–CVS, 23rd & 1st
Overheard by: katie facada
Guy: …and he had, like, shark teeth! Three fucking rows of them! I swear.
–Fulton & Gold
Thug #1: …and the next thing you know, you’ll be doing Miss Congeniality 3.
Thug #2: Word.
–39th & 8th
