Man: What’s that you’re putting on your cheesecake?
Woman: My cholesterol medication.
Man: Um… I don’t think that’s how it works.
–Carnegie Deli
Overheard by: Julie
Man: What’s that you’re putting on your cheesecake?
Woman: My cholesterol medication.
Man: Um… I don’t think that’s how it works.
–Carnegie Deli
Overheard by: Julie
Teen boy #1: Okay, tell the truth. Have you ever tried to lick your own balls? I’ll be honest, I’ve tried.
Teen boy #2: I’ve thought about it, I just know I couldn’t do it.
–108th & Columbus
Girl yelling across the street: Yo, she got more hair on her pussy than your bitch got on her head!
–St. John’s, Crown Heights
Woman on cell. One hundred dollars? You must have me confused with 1-800-Crack Whore.
–W 57th
Guy #1: Don’t throw away that Gatorade bottle! I gotta do something.
Guy #2: …Right now?
Guy #1: Yeah!
Guy #2: There’s a pizza place right there!
Guy #1: They won’t let me use theirs! Don’t you throw that bottle away!
–25th & 2nd
Businessguy: It’s a small world.
Businesschick: Especially in Astoria!
Businessguy: Ha, ha, ha!
Businesschick: Hee, hee.
–Midtown office
Man: You look like someone I knew in college.
Hot lady suit: Oh, yeah?
Man: Where did you go to school?
Hot lady suit: BMCC.
Man: I went to Queens.
Hot lady suit: I did, too, for a while.
Man: Oh, my name is Eric. So, are you single?
Hot lady suit: Sometimes.
Man: Oooh.
–V train
Overheard by: Black White Woman
Guy: We have to figure out a way to get rid of her bird.
Girl: I hate birds like that. They’re full of secrets and dust.
Guy: And lice and opinions.
–13th & A
Promoter guy: Come see a great comedy show tonight! The tickets are just $5!
Chick: I can’t, I have to study.
Promoter guy: Oh come on, you don’t have to study.
Chick: I actually do, sorry.
Promoter guy: Studying will never get you anywhere.
Chick: Yeah, I’ll remember that next time I’m selling $5 tickets in the snow.
–West 3rd and Sullivan
Overheard by: sarahbelle
Girl: I didn’t know my brother was going to be at the party! And he was in a sarong!
–Park Ave S & E 25th
Guy on cell: No, no. You can wear hats on the internet.
–Smith & Wyckoff, Cobble Hill
Kid presses call button on commuter hotline phone.
Father: Why did you do that?
Son: I’m sorry. I didn’t know what it was.
Father: If you do that again the police will arrest you.
Son: Really?
Father: Yes, George Bush will come and take you to jail.
Son: What?
Father: He will kill you and put your picture on the Wall of Memories [Ground Zero feature].
–World Trade Center PATH station
