Guy: Damn, this escalator’s small…fat bitches can’t get on this.
–Movie Theater, Times Square
Overheard by: Alayna
Guy: Damn, this escalator’s small…fat bitches can’t get on this.
–Movie Theater, Times Square
Overheard by: Alayna
Into an unplugged phone, a hobo yells: Honey, honey, I told you not to call me in the office!
–LES
Bimbo: So are you ever going to move back to Europe?
Eurotrash: I was thinking about that a couple of times when I was really, really depressed in LA. American culture is such a product of the country.
–Soho
Yuppie #1: I only went to Brazil for a month, but on my third day there I met her.
Yuppie #2: Women in South America are so hot. Especially Brazil and Spain.
–Belgian Beer Bar, Greenwich Village
Club Promoter: Do you guys like comedy shows?
Chicks: No!
Club Promoter: That wasn’t funny.
–34th & 7th
Drunk Girl: Ha ha, I’m talking so loud. I’m making such ear pollution.
Drunk Guy: Nooo, it’s called noise pollution…
Drunk Girl: But like, what is noise pollution?
Drunk Guy: I dunno…I think it’s like when you’re vulgar, so I try not to curse all the time. That way, when I say like “oh fuck” everyone will be all like “Whoaaaaaa.”
–NYU Dorm Elevator
Overheard by: Stephanie
Girl #1: I hate how my body is cold but my face is freezing off.
Guy: You could wear a ski mask.
Girl #1: But then you look like a douche.
Girl #2: Yeah, like that guy [across the street].
Girl #1: He’s not wearing a ski mask. He’s black.
–26th & 7th
Overheard by: Ricki Lagotte
Man: 40 is the new 30; my teacher said that. She said 12 is the new 11. But she used to say 11 was the new 10.
–St. Mark’s Place
Woman #1: I’m ready for ugly, if it keeps me warm in bed.
Woman #2: I don’t know about that.
–UES
Overheard by: Todd Seavey
Man: …and three plain cheeseburgers.
Cashier: Plain? Does that mean you want those with cheese, or not?
–McDonald’s, St. Mark’s Place
