Little boy holding bunch of flowers: Here comes the bride! Here comes the bride!
Nanny: Okay, but we have to pay for those first.
Little boy: Nooo!
–Outside Fairway near 74th & Broadway
Overheard by: Tigertail
Little boy holding bunch of flowers: Here comes the bride! Here comes the bride!
Nanny: Okay, but we have to pay for those first.
Little boy: Nooo!
–Outside Fairway near 74th & Broadway
Overheard by: Tigertail
Thug #1: I heard he’s in some shit. Married, two kids, child support,
a wife, girl on the side, and she just found out about his boyfriend.
Thug #2: Yeah, that’s some shit.
–15th & 3rd
Overheard by: Garrett Ricciardi
Guy: You in need of a husband?
Woman: I’ve got the clap.
–N train
Overheard by: Camille Marquis
Woman #1: I’ve been with him for five years.
Woman #2: Wow. That’s the longest you’ve been with anyone, isn’t it?
Woman #1: Yes…unless you count my two marriages.
–Midtown elevator
Overheard by: Tommy Raiko
Guy: My wife doesn’t like my tattoos.
Woman next to him: I’ve always thought that marriage should be like a driver’s license. You can either renew it after five years… or not.
–F Train
Female bartender: And so, now that she is pregnant she is going to get married.
Male bartender: That's horrible. Is the dad the father?
–45th St & Broadway
Man on cell: Good morning! How are you?
Man: Tell me the bad news…
Man: No, really… Tell me the bad news
Man: You’re PREGNANT? How did that happen?
Man: I know how it happened…but I mean…I thought you were on the pill!
Man: Well, what are we going to do about this? [pause] I can’t have a kid with you. [pause] I’M MARRIED!
–47th & Avenue of the Americas
Overheard by: Cynthia Frawley
Suit #1: So how was working in the Atlanta office? Hook up with any girls there?
Suit #2: Man, every girl in that city who’s over 21 is either married or divorced. Lots of good-looking ones, though. But it’s like you think you’re in Barney’s and it’s really Salvation Army.
–Park & 48th
Guy to girlfriend: Will you just hold my fucking hand?
–45th & Broadway
Overheard by: waiting for my prince charming
Guy: You know, I used to think cheating on girls was wrong.
–Whitestone, Queens
Overheard by: Michelle
Young woman, looking at Lolita book jacket: Wow. This kind of reminds me of my relationship.
–Borders, 33rd & 7th
Overheard by: with a K
Man on cell: No, dear, I do not want to hear what you’re doing to yourself right now.
–Union Square
Overheard by: Alexandra
Woman, to man she’s just kissed: What was your name again?
–2nd St & 1st Ave
Man on cell: My wife is driving me crazy! She keeps following my girlfriend around! Wait, hold on, I have to take this call. Hello…Yeah I just stepped out of the office for a few minutes… Thanks, honey, you’re the best.
–LIRR
Overheard by: Sara Swank
Girl on cell: He liked me too much, so I fuckin’ dumped him.
–Columbus Circle
Overheard by: buffalo
Girl#1: And he was all like, “Boo hoo, I wish you were here to take care of me. Come snuggle.”
Girl#2: Aww! That’s sweet.
Girl#1: Ew! No it’s not! [after rolling eyes and taking sip of coffee] that’s what his fucking wife is for…
Girl#2: I… Do you hear yourself?
Girl#1: Fuck you!
–NYU
