Yuppie #1: I only went to Brazil for a month, but on my third day there I met her.
Yuppie #2: Women in South America are so hot. Especially Brazil and Spain.
–Belgian Beer Bar, Greenwich Village
Yuppie #1: I only went to Brazil for a month, but on my third day there I met her.
Yuppie #2: Women in South America are so hot. Especially Brazil and Spain.
–Belgian Beer Bar, Greenwich Village
Club Promoter: Do you guys like comedy shows?
Chicks: No!
Club Promoter: That wasn’t funny.
–34th & 7th
Man: 40 is the new 30; my teacher said that. She said 12 is the new 11. But she used to say 11 was the new 10.
–St. Mark’s Place
Drunk: You are here all the time! How are you here all the time? I come in at 2PM, you’re here. I come in at 5PM, you’re here. You are always here! When do you sleep?
Cashier: I am a twin.
–Park Slope bodega, 5AM
Woman #1: I’m ready for ugly, if it keeps me warm in bed.
Woman #2: I don’t know about that.
–UES
Overheard by: Todd Seavey
Girl: Later at night, my tongue gets sore because I’ve been playing with it so much.
–St. Mark’s Place
Lady: Excuse me sir, can I bum a ciga…oh, you’re smoking a joint.
–3rd Ave. & 12th Street
Overheard by: David H
Guy: I’ve been to Germany twice because I have a friend who’s from there. I went to Oktoberfest, but it was in June.
Hans: They had Oktoberfest in June? It must have been just for you…American tourists.
–25th St. & 3rd Ave.
A tourist woman examines Dali’s masterpiece and comments: Oh hey, this is supposed to be famous, but I can’t remember why.
–MoMA
Overheard by: Greg Rutter
Hip Hop Guy on cell: I’ll just keep my nuts shaved and everything’ll be fine.
–Varick Street
Coffee guy on phone: I’m not talking about whacking off, I’m talking about fried chicken!
–Alt.coffee, Avenue A
Overheard by: Dibson Hoffweiler
