Stop Using Sex as a Weapon

Hipster guy: Wax makes my hair too sticky, I like the mud better.
Hipster girl: I can’t believe we have sex.

–Mott & Spring

Girl: “Feeling sick? Sex can help–”
Professor lady: You haven’t had any lately, have you?

–Pace University

Guy #1: With fiction books, if someone tells you the ending, it’s like there’s no point to them. But with non-fiction, you can know exactly what’s going to happen and they’re still a joy to read.
Guy #2: Man, you really should try getting laid sometime. Stop bothering me.

–Clovis Press, Williamsburg

Overheard by: nalin

Posted on August 29, 2014
Guys, Hipsters, Sex, Williamsburg

Attack of the Moongoloid

Texas girl: Oh look, y’all! It’s a half moon. That means tomorrow will be a 3/4 moon, and then the next night will be a full moon.

–Williamsburg

Overheard by: andybennett

Posted on August 24, 2014
Animals & Nature, Midwesterners, Stupidity, Williamsburg

Wednesday One-Liners Are Walkin' in a Winter Wonderland

Woman: One time this guy punched me…but it was alright, cause I was on coke.

–2 Train

Overheard by: Laura Grossman

Female hipster on cell: I'm coked up and all alone, Harvey, how do you expect me to feel?

–Humboldt & Ainslie, Williamsburg

Overheard by: Joseph Hernandez

Girl on cell: I haven't done coke in like a week. It's been a rough week.

–Upper East Side

Hot 20-something tourist girl to friend: Pfft, the Meatpacking District. That's false advertising…I got no meat packed in me last night. All I did was steal that bag of cocaine from those guys.

–Broadway & Wooster

Overheard by: ClassyGal

Female 20-something on phone: Yeah, he realized it was too late when he couldn't tell the difference between the piles of sugar, the piles of flour, and the piles of cocaine.

–Central Park

Posted on August 24, 2014
All Wednesday One-Liners, Central Park, Cocaine, Cocaine Diet, Compare/Contrast, Druggies, Food, Friends, Girls, Hipsters, On Cell, On the Subway, One-liners, Punch, Questions, Soho, Thievery, Time, Tourists, Upper East Side, Wednesday One-Liners, Weirdness, Williamsburg, Women

Loving Teenagers

Teenage girl #1: What are you talking about? I hate so many people!
Teenage girl #2: No you don’t!
Teenage girl #1: Yes I do!
Teenage girl #2: I always talk about how much I hate Tom and you–
Teenage girl #1: Oh, I don’t hate people I know. I only hate celebrities.

–Williamsburg