Dude #1: That party was fun. It was hot, though.
Dude #2: Yeah, it smelled like hot ass in there.
–Loews Hotel, Lexington & 51st
Guy: Yo, she smelled like dead hell!
–Flatbush
Dude #1: That party was fun. It was hot, though.
Dude #2: Yeah, it smelled like hot ass in there.
–Loews Hotel, Lexington & 51st
Guy: Yo, she smelled like dead hell!
–Flatbush
The cashier scans an old lady’s ricotta cheese.
Cashier: Why didn’t you get the bigger one?
Old Lady: ‘Cause I’ll eat it all! This way I have a limit.
–Waldbaum’s, Bensonhurst
American woman: Don’t push me. I saw you trying to get ahead of me!
Russian woman: What you talking about? I did not.
American woman: You did, too! You’re all the same, so goddamn pushy.
Russian woman: What, what you think I am? Look at me! What you think I am? What I look like to you?
American woman: Well, I’d say you look like a fat big mouthed bleach blonde bitch whore!
Russian woman: What? I get my husband on you!
American woman: Go ahead! I’m sure he’s home and not working. You’re all here for a free handout!
The Russian woman storms out to find her husband.
American woman: What did she want? She asked what do I look like so I told her. I was only being honest!
–Bensonhurst
Overheard by: Deborah Olin
Middle schooler on field trip: Oh my god, we're gonna get knifed.
–Times Square
Woman on cell: Do you have any chainsaws I can borrow?
–38th & 2nd
Harley Davidson dude to another: So I stabbed that guy, and that guy, and then that guy.
–7th St & Bedford Ave
Overheard by: NYCQ
Woman on cell: Today is not the day. I can't come to 14th Street or I'll stab you.
–42nd St & Ave of the Americas
Overheard by: Matthew
Brooklyn mom: You are the only kid I have ever met who doesn't like goat cheese.
Nine-year-old: Peanut butter!
–Brooklyn Heights
Automated announcement: Bus operators are protected by New York state law. Assaulting a bus operator is a felony.
Guy sitting behind bus operator, loud: Hooray!
Bus operator: Scaring me is a misdemeanor.
–Brooklyn
Overheard by: Robert
Pimp to player across the street: Yo! Stay over there, this side's for pimps and that side's for players. I'm a pimp. Lemme show you that pimp walk! (starts walking down the street, gets to player) How you like that, playa? That's how we do it, pimp style.
–115th & 7th, Harlem
Overheard by: beeloo
Female college student: Valentine's Day? Girl, pimps don't do Valentine's.
–1 Train
Girl on cell: I feel like a pimp, I say hi to everybody.
–86th & 4th, Brooklyn
Elderly man to even more elderly man: I'm gonna pimp-slap you right down on the street!
–Times Square
Catholic schoolgirls coming out of subway station, in unison: All those nuns care about is fucking us!
–Canal & Varick
Girl on phone, mocking tone: Oh, he's at church, huh? I don't know why he goes to church, he's going to hell anyway, ain't no room for a Blood in heaven!
–BedStuy
Woman: I wanted to raise them Quaker; I just never got around to it.
–The Village
Overheard by: Aaron
Old lady: Well, she's a bitch to say she's religious!
–Madison Ave
Teenage thug #1, to friends: Yo, you know who Dumbledore is?
Teenage thug #2: Ummm, yes!
Teenage thug #1: So what's his full name?
Teenage thug #3: Okay! Here it comes!
Teenage thug #4: Yeah, this is the shit right here!
All thugs, in unison: Albus… Percival… Wulfric… Brian… Dumbledore!
Teenage thug #1: That's what I'm talking about! Yeah!
–Sunset Park, Brooklyn
Overheard by: even i didn't remember
Skinny blond girl: So, you can do my friend for a hundred dollars.
Larger brunette: Yeah, you can have me anyway you like.
Older man: Anyway I like?
Skinny blond girl: Yeah.
Older man: How about on credit?
–Brooklyn Heights
Overheard by: MYSTI
