Thug #1: It is on fire, I swear! I cannot walk around anymore.
Thug #2: Dude, just because it itches doesn’t mean it’s an STD.
–Observation Deck, Empire State Building
Overheard by: StrikeForceAwesome
Thug #1: It is on fire, I swear! I cannot walk around anymore.
Thug #2: Dude, just because it itches doesn’t mean it’s an STD.
–Observation Deck, Empire State Building
Overheard by: StrikeForceAwesome
Lady: Yeah, I mean I’m looking for something that is a fit for me. Ya know, you’re either an East Side girl or a West Side girl… there’s really no in-between.
Real estate agent: Right, right, I understand. That’s why I’m here.
Lady: Because you know, I don’t want to be surrounded by frat bros and their yoga moms.
Real estate: Understandable, I wouldn’t subject anyone to that.
–Starbucks, 57th & Lexington
Overheard by: trying to get caffeine fix
Teen #1: Yo, that machete nigga was dancin’ with Hitler in heaven!
Teen #2: Yo, with Hitla?!
Teen #3: Oh, shit!
–Malcolm X & Lafayette, Brooklyn
Overheard by: off white
Animated queer: I knew Rachel was going to fall into the trap! I just knew it. I said to myself: “She’s going to fall into the trap!” and then she showed up, and I told her, “Rachel. Girl, don’t fall into the trap!” and what did she do?
Female companion: She fell into the trap!
–Church St & Vesey
Overheard by: Manhattman
Hobo: Hello.
Girl: Um… Hello.
Hobo: (gives girl some coins and smiles) You look like a nice girl. Don’t become a whore.
Girl: Um… Thanks, I guess.
–6 Train
Overheard by: April
13-year-old girl: Oh my god, you and Isabel have a new inside joke?
Friend: Oh my god, you check my Facebook wall like everyday, don’t you?
13-year-old girl: Yeah, I do. Didn’t you see that I sent you a new bumper sticker? It says “I respect your sluttiness.”
–Darkened Bathroom, Bat Mitzvah Party
Puppeteer: Do you know who Benjamin Franklin is?
Little boy: There’s no such thing as Benjamin Franklin!
–McDonald’s, 9th Street, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Ian
Tourist wife (looking at map): Avenue of the Americas… That’s the one with all the stars and the handprints in the cement, right?
Tourist husband (with a tone of superiority): No, that’s Broadway.
–Staten Island Ferry
Overheard by: Caroline
Souvenir photographer: Please step down, ma’am. We are taking photos of everyone before we board.
Passenger: Is this in case I die?
–Pier 83
Old woman: Take a picture of me with Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie and their son.
Young woman: Mom, the black kid isn’t a wax figure.
Old woman: Well, she just keeps adopting them, I thought it was her son!
–Madame Tussaud’s
Overheard by: Julie
