Young black teen in a fight #1: Yo, your face look like a Dorito!
Young black teen in a fight #2: Yo, you look like a slave!
–Central Park
Overheard by: Angana
Young black teen in a fight #1: Yo, your face look like a Dorito!
Young black teen in a fight #2: Yo, you look like a slave!
–Central Park
Overheard by: Angana
Girlfriend: I am going to kill myself and blame it on you.
Boyfriend: Great… I’ll sign your suicide note!
–Broadway & Lafayette
Overheard by: sneakey black guy
Hefty chick #1: Well, I didn’t want to fight her, but she called me a fat bitch.
Hefty chick #2: Oh, lawd!
Hefty chick #1: So I backed up on her and dropped her with my elbow.
–41st St. & 7th Ave.
Michigan tourist: The first time I came to New York, Shannon and I saw two men pull knives on each other–they had a gang fight in the street!
Michigan tourist's mom: Oh my!
Michigan tourist: It was hysterical. We took pictures.
–Long Island Railroad
Girl: What happened?
Guy: Man, that girl brushed up on me, so I turned around, and the bitch said, “Don’t fucking look at me!” and she slapped me!
Girl: Really?!
Guy: And then my girl just starting beating on her!
Girlfriend: Haha yeah! Did you see all that blood?
Guy: Girl must have been coked out for it to come spilling out like that.
Girl: It was crazy! We didn’t know what was going on!
Girlfriend: Its like that time at the club when I took off my shoe!
–Kellogg Diner, Brooklyn
College guy, running away: I wasn't cheating! That's how you play hide-and-seek!
Girl, running after him with baseball bat: You can't hide home base!
–North Woods, Central Park
Professor: So I told my grad students they could have an A if they earned it, or if they beat me in a 12-minute cage fight.
–Fordham Universityy
Israeli politics professor, after class: There's enough Tylenol out there to take care of your hangovers after Purim. So, all your sorry little asses better be in this class at three o'clock, Wednesday afternoon.
–Yeshiva University
English professor: Yeah, the end of the poem relates to the beginning. Every good poem has a return… just like a good walk.
–Hunter college
Professor: Of course there was marital harmony! As we all know, the family who cuts drugs together, stays together.
–Fordham Law School
Overheard by: EntertainedStudent
Professor: An example of synecdoche would be, "get your ass over here." You want all of them, not just their ass. But sometimes, you do just want their ass. And we all know how that goes. But that sort of thing doesn't happen in a classroom… usually.
–NYU
Overheard by: queenofscots
Voice over speaker phone: Bitch, I tol’ you stay away! I tol’ you back off! Bitch!
Girl, very calmly: That kinda attitude is why your man is eatin’ my pussy.
–Washington & Lafayette, Clinton Hill
Overheard by: nmf
Law professor: Sometimes you just want to tell your client, "Wake the fuck up!"
–NYU Law School
Law student on cell: Well, it's hard to locate them, since I don't know who they are.
–Columbia Law School
Overheard by: arctinus
Older looking woman on cell: No, don't fight him, Henry. We're Jewish. God gave us lawyers for a reason.
–42nd & Avenue of the Americas
Overheard by: Elizabeth
Awesome judge: If you do not have a basic understanding of the English language, you will not be able to serve. If you cannot understand what I'm saying, please come up now. Now, two translators will translate what I just said. If you understood what I said, obviously don't come up here.
–Supreme Court Building
Suit to girl: You must be a lawyer. (pause) Or a cunt.
–Bryant Park
Overheard by: How did he know?
Thug: Don't say anything to her! Don't you know anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law?
–132nd & St. Nicholas
Drunk lawyer on phone: Yeah! I convict rape victims.
–Outside Shea Stadium
Woman: Hey! Hey! I know who started the fight! You wanna know?!
Cop: Yeah, sure.
Woman: Actually, I don’t know. Hahaha. I’m going home right now to watch porn, I don’t even care! Haha.
Cop: Wow.
–Broad and Bay, Staten Island
Overheard by: Brandi
