Chick: So, I went over to tell the guy to stop masturbating on the subway–
Dude, interrupting: –Wait, he had it out?!
Chick: Yeah, he had it out! And he called me a fascist for telling him to stop!
–4th & 6th
Chick: So, I went over to tell the guy to stop masturbating on the subway–
Dude, interrupting: –Wait, he had it out?!
Chick: Yeah, he had it out! And he called me a fascist for telling him to stop!
–4th & 6th
Girl #1: I walked in on my boy masturbating while we where getting ready for sex.
Girl #2: Oh my god, I love masturbating before sex. It’s like a free orgasm.
Girl #1: Me, too. It’s, like, spiritual in my family.
–4th St & Park Ave
Korean girl: I just can’t stand it when they have an Asian fetish. Grosses me out.
Suit: Well, maybe you should stop being a stripper.
–46th & 10th
Overheard by: Chris
Thugette #1: Man, where the fuck am I gonna get a prom dress and after-party outfit? You know, I should just sell crack! Ain’t nobody gonna stop me!
Thugette #2: Yeah, that’s the best part about being a girl.
–Q46 bus
Overheard by: DaraDay
Headline by: Zorak
Runners-Up:
· “By the way, are you free to babysit that night?” – bobofthejungle
· “Miracle of birth ain’t got nothin’ on pushin'” – Erin
· “Sugar and Crack and Everything Whack” – The Trayster
· “The Third Wave of Feminism Wants Its Money, Bitch” – clevecinema
· “Well, Other Than the Multiple Orgasms…” – Teppy
Dude to woman: You can’t talk about the second dimension, but you can talk about sewing?!
–12th & 4th
Overheard by: Joy
Asian woman to boyfriend: I am not going to talk about having a threesome with you and your clone on the train!
–Brooklyn-bound F train
Overheard by: Ann
Chick on cell: … Talking about the apocalypse, but they were really laid back people.
–Barnard College
Lady: I can’t even talk to you for seven minutes, and you’re about to be my husband!
–Union Square
Woman on cell: I know you’re full of muscle relaxants and want to chat, but I can’t talk right now. Just take a picture of it and email it to me.
–57th & 6th
Overheard by: Withnail
Girl: Oh! Funny story — I was talking to my therapist about suicide yesterday…
–13th & 6th
Overheard by: gigglesnort
Mother: Honey, save the cookies for later.
Little girl: You’re so mean! I’m gonna sell you on eBay!
–6 train, 59th St
Overheard by: effie
Boy trying to get teacher to call on him: Oh my god, I have a really good point to make!
Girl, just as eager: Shut up! Mine is better!
–Hunter College High
Chick: If he was straight he would have been staring at my breasts!
Queer passerby: It’s true.
–W 54th & 9th
Overheard by: Big Poppa
Creepy man, about tourist’s rack: Are those real?
Tourist girl to friend: Whoa, I guess we should have left our nice purses at home…
–Broadway
Coworker chick #1: You ready, spaghetti?
Coworker chick #2: [Silence.]Coworker chick #1: Well?!
Coworker chick #2: Wait, I’m thinking.
Coworker chick #1: Oh, okay.
Coworker chick #2: Like Lawrence Ferlinghetti!
–84th & 3rd
Overheard by: da sarkastik ninja.
