Chick: Do you ever wonder if we’ll get tired of being so rich? You know, like what if later in life we randomly, like, decide to renounce our possessions or something drastic and move to Africa?
Man: What, are you saying you don’t enjoy our lifestyle anymore?
Chick: I don’t know… hey, do you wanna get some coke later?
–82nd & 1st
Overheard by: chuzzle in space
Guy: (says something in Hindi to friend across the aisle)
Crazy guy: Go on over there, son.
Guy: Do you speak Hindi?
Crazy guy: No, I speak French.
Guy: Well, I was speaking Hindi.
Crazy guy: Well, I was speaking Spanish.
–L Train
Guy #1: So, are you gonna go to the pharmacy again?
Guy #2: No, dude.
Guy #1: Why not? You should go to the pharmacy.
Guy #2: Dude, if I go to the pharmacy it's gonna be so awkward. She found my number in the database and called me.
–The Met
Big guy #1: Yeah, Greece is absolutely the best!
Big guy #2: Mmm.
Big guy #1: Greece is the best.
Big guy #1: If you want to take it up the ass…
–6th Ave & 17th St, Chelsea
Guy #1: Yeah, so I'm going back to the doctor to get the rash checked out. They think I might be allergic to my girlfriend's…
Guy #2, interrupting: Oh god, I don't want to know.
Guy #1: Skin lotion!
Guy #2: Oh.
Guy #1: Dude, what did you think I was about to say? It's on my hand.
–Columbia University
Overheard by: I wasn't thinking it.
Guy #1: This isn't that crowded.
Guy #2: Yeah, the other day I was on a different train and we were packed in like sardines, this lady had her boobs in my face.
Guy #1: Oh, that's nice.
Guy #2: And the best part is her shirt said “stop staring, bitch!”
–7 Train
Overheard by: Beck
Girl: It's so good to see you! I'm so glad you're coming to the party!
Guy #1: Me too! I'm excited.
Girl: But we should warn you–there's a very good chance this could turn into an orgy.
Guy #2: Not to put any pressure on you.
Guy #1: I mean, that's awesome. I've never been to an orgy before.
–NJ Transit
Overheard by: Flustered Commuter
Unfortunate-looking guy: …and I met this girl there so I'm pretty excited to go back.
Female friend: Is she blind?
Unfortunate-looking guy: No, she's actually a brunette and she's got freckles.
Female friend: No, I asked you if she was blind.
Unfortunate-looking guy: I missed you so much.
–Staten Island Ferry
Overheard by: Lauren
Guy #1: Oh my god, they have ribbed ones.
Guy #2: And flavored. Shit, I got to get a flavored one.
Guy #1: Awesome, flavored condoms are awesome!
Guy #2: They are. They are freaking awesome!
(guy #1 notices man at urinal).
Guy #1: Dude, we’re not gay.
–O’Hanlon’s Bar, 14th St & 1st Ave
Overheard by: Dude
