Girlfriend: She fell off her bike and broke all her teeth, so now she has fake ones.
Boyfriend: Well, couldn’t she get white ones? I mean, were they not giving out human teeth that day?
Girlfriend, getting up and hugging him: That’s why I love you.
–Cafe Gitane, Mott & Prince
Overheard by: tea sipper
Man, yelling: I love this woman! I love this woman!
Woman: So where’s the ring?
–51st & 7th
Overheard by: kt
Little boy: Mom! Look, candy! I want candy!
Mother: No, you can’t have candy. Besides, they only put that there to trick you into buying it when you don’t really want it. It’s called an impulse buy. Do you want to be tricked?
Little boy: Mooom! Why won’t you buy me caaandy?!
Mother: Because I don’t love you enough.
–Blockbuster, 8th & Broadway
Overheard by: Emily
Thug guy: Son, he was pissed. She swallowed his cousin’s babies, but she wouldn’t swallow his.
Thug girl: That ain’t true love.
–L train
Guy: I’m in love!
Girl: Awwww.
Guy: With marijuana.
Girl: Oh.
–18th & 10th
Overheard by: John K
Drunk guy: Don’t you fuck with me!
Sober woman: What?
Drunk guy: You sleep with a different guy every night!
Sober woman: I do not. What are you talking about?
Drunk guy: You love…me. You want to marry…me.
Sober woman: This is ridiculous. I’ve had enough. I don’t have to take this anymore. Goodbye!
She leaves. He turns to the next table.
Drunk guy: Yeah, did you see that girl who just left? I just dumped her. Can I buy you two a drink?
–Rosie O’Grady’s, 7th Avenue
Chick #1: So I told him I love him…
Chick #2: Aw. that’s so cute.
Chick #1: Yeah. And it was, like, true…I think.
–Lafayette Street Residence
Overheard by: bottom
A couple walks by holding hands, a tall man and a short woman.
Chick: What’s with the Wookie-Ewok love?
Guy: Dude, that’s harsh.
–13th & University
Girl: You know her, she’s making stuff up again!
Crazy woman: Hey! Did you just call me Chewbacca?
–1 train
Overheard by: poptart
