Girl: How much is the water?
Newstand guy: $1.25. Do you want a bag?
Girl: No thanks.
Newstand guy: What about a straw?
Girl: No.
Newstand guy: How about me?
–E 68th & 3rd ave
Girl: How much is the water?
Newstand guy: $1.25. Do you want a bag?
Girl: No thanks.
Newstand guy: What about a straw?
Girl: No.
Newstand guy: How about me?
–E 68th & 3rd ave
Vendor guy: Hey baby, do you want the Post delivered every morning?
Hot girl: No, I don’t know how to read.
Vendor guy: That’s all right, I’ll read it to you. I’ll come to your crib and read it to you every morning.
–3rd Ave street fair
Overheard by: Andy Marc
Man: Hi…Nice to see you again.
Woman: Hi.
Man: How’s your Prius?
–Broadway & 8th during Anti-War Rally
Overheard by: Joey Gillis
Crazy guy: Can I taste some of your saliva?
Teen girl: What he just say?
Teen boy: He wanted to taste my salami?
Teen girl: Ha, ha. Say yeah.
Teen boy: Yeah!
–7th Street & 3rd Avenue
Man: You could turn people to stone with your eyes.
Girl: Dude, there are lots of other people on this train, go hit on someone else.
Man: I know, but you’re the closest and I don’t want to move because I have to pee.
–2 train
Chick #1: Hooray, I’m free!
Chick #2: You’d better take your nametag off, then.
Chick #1: Yeah, I don’t want guys who come up to me being all, “Hello, Diana.”
–14th & 3rd
Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster
Woman: Well, he should just get over it. Who doesn’t have a mother who died?
–MOMA cafeteria
Overheard by: Deborah Freeman
Guy #1: Man, how you gonna play like a kid came on to you? A four year old can’t even get it up.
Guy #2: How do you know? You hit on a four year old?
Guy #1: Nah, man. I was one.
–Elevator, Hudson & Houston
Overheard by: Michele
Hobo: Spare some change for the leprechaun? I just need four dollars to get back over the rainbow.
–1 train
Hobo: Yeah man, that’s good shit. Except for those white-ass American bandstand drummers. Whoever heard of fucking Clark Kent playing bongos?
–55th & 9th
Overheard by: Luke Reynolds
