Maxim staff #1: Yeah, we’re going to make you walk around in a plastic bubble or something.
Maxim staff #2: …NO, that is not THE RIGHT KIND of herpes!
Maxim staff #3: Is there a RIGHT kind of herpes?
–Midtown elevator
Maxim staff #1: Yeah, we’re going to make you walk around in a plastic bubble or something.
Maxim staff #2: …NO, that is not THE RIGHT KIND of herpes!
Maxim staff #3: Is there a RIGHT kind of herpes?
–Midtown elevator
Man: Hey, I finally got that promotion!
Woman: Oh my god, congratulations! High five!
Man: Don’t touch me.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Aaliyah Leuschner
Teen boy #1: Oh man, it was like an episode of I Love Lucy.
Teen boy #2: I love who?
Teen boy #1: Lucy. Oh man,you don’t know what I Love Lucy is? Bam! I ain’t your friend no more.
–Q train
Guy on cell: What, you thought they were going to let fat people into the club?
–N train
Girl #1: I just got waxed. Feel my legs, they’re sooo soft.
Girl #2: Ooohhh. Sooo smooth.
Girl #1: Yeah, you should feel my cooch.
–Columbia University
Girl #1: What’s up?
Girl #2: Still recovering from last night.
Girl #1: It wasn’t that bad.
Girl #2: What? I passed out and woke up naked in the club.
Girl #1: See, I told you.
–Internet cafe, 63rd Drive, Queens
Overheard by: Interested Listener
Suit #1: How long have you lived here?
Suit #2: How old are you? Probably longer than you have been alive.
Suit #1: Born and raised in New York, huh?
Suit #2: No, a farm in PA. Got the fuck out of there, though. Met a girl from New York–well actually, Long Island–married her and moved out here. Thought she had money. Yeah…fooled the shit out of me.
Suit #3: Ha, you were that close to being better than all of us.
–Wall & Water
Suit #1: That was a pretty good meeting…
Suit #2: Yeah, we got a lot done.
Hobo: Was Liam Neeson in it?
–51st & Madison
Overheard by: BDA
Hipster girl: Gosh, I’m like Pavlov’s dog!
Guy: What the hell is that?
Hipster girl: You don’t know? They teach it in, like, every science class ever!
Guy: So, what is it?
Hipster girl: It has something to do with bells and drool, I’m not really sure.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Tres Chic
Loud guy: They’re both really pretty.
Girl: Yeah, sure.
Loud guy: Sure, they’ve got busted noses, but they’re still really pretty.
–Chola Restaurant, 58th St, between 2nd & 3rd Ave
