Indian woman: Are you Jewish?
White woman: Yes.
Indian woman: My neighbor in Pennsylvania was Jewish. She was a lovely woman.
White woman: There are all kinds.
–12th St & Prospect Park West
Overheard by: Bemused Brooklynite
Indian woman: Are you Jewish?
White woman: Yes.
Indian woman: My neighbor in Pennsylvania was Jewish. She was a lovely woman.
White woman: There are all kinds.
–12th St & Prospect Park West
Overheard by: Bemused Brooklynite
Conductor: All tickets… Ticket, please.
Drunk pirate guy: I, uh… I don’t have any money… Uh [unintelligible slurring]…
Man nearby: Hey, conductor, ask for the fare in doubloons, or pieces of eight!
–Eastbound LIRR
Overheard by: Alex
Dude: Now I’ve seen everything! The Yankees–
Passerby, interrupting: –Have you seen a man eat his own head?
Dude: Ummm, no.
Passerby: Watch closely.
–Outside Yankee Stadium
Girl: Excuse me! Do you have a girlfriend?
Guy passerby: Yes [keeps walking].
Girl: But does she appreciate you? You’re beautiful!
–Broadway, near City Hall Park
Overheard by: just walkin
Suit to woman blocking left side of escalator: Politely excuse me, could you move aside? (woman waves man around and keeps chatting on cell)
Suit, politely: Ma'am, you should stay to the right if you are standing.
(woman angrily waves, mutters)
Suit, pushing her past: Fucking cunt!
Woman, politely: Fuck you, bitch.
–WTC PATH Station
Overheard by: Mondo Man
Stranger: Hi, cutie! What a handsome little boy you are!
Toddler boy exiting stall with mom: I got a hair cut, and I just made a big poop!
Stranger: Um, okay.
–Ladies’ room, LIRR
Overheard by: Cathleen B
Dude #1: This hot weather has been rough on my skin, man.
Dude #2: Hey, uh. Hey, man. I know what you can do for that. You can mix lemon juice with some vinegar and make yourself an astringent.
Dude #1: Oh, word? Have you tried this yourself?
Dude #2: Yeah, man. The lemon juice and the vinegar, they combine to cleanse your pores. I’m telling you, man.
Dude #1: How do you know all this? You just sit here on this park bench every day.
Dude #2: Naw, man, just during the summer. I work in the schools.
Dude #1: You an educator?
Dude #2: A what?
Dude #1: An ED-U-CA-TOR! A teacher.
Dude #2: Yeah. Yeah, that’s right. I’m an educator.
Dude #1: Whatchu been drinking, man?
Dude #2: Vodka.
Dude #1: Yeah, I can smell it.
–Christopher Park, 74th St
Overheard by: Carol – Pretending to read my book
Shirtless old guy, walking over to a group of friends: Looks like you got a nice circle there, mind if I join you guys?
Stranger: No, I think we’re good…
Shirtless old guy: Well, I’ll be back…[looks up at the trees.] Do you see the pterodactyls? …up there, the dinosaurs? [Wakes up a hobo on the benches.] Sir, you see them, don’t you? …pterodactyls…pkawww pkawww [flaps his arms.][back to the group of friends]I’ll be back. pkawww!
–Union Square
Overheard by: Arvind Chandra
Frantic woman: Please help me! I need double-stick tape and a whistle!
–K-Mart, 34th St
Asian woman: Well, he's going to die soon enough.
Random woman: You can't wait that long, babe!
–Au Bon Pain
Overheard by: Lucy Lorretta Gambln
