I Take Drugs to Forget

Columbia student #1: It’s funny how many kids do coke at this school… Actually, it’s disgusting.
Columbia student #2: Wait, but you just bought an eightball a few hours ago.
Columbia student #1: Oh, yeah.

–116th & Broadway

Overheard by: keith smith

Posted on January 22, 2019
Cocaine, Compare/Contrast, Druggies, Students, Stupidity, Talking/Convos, Upper West Side & Lincoln Center

And They Don’t Tell You ’til the Third Date

NYU bimbette #1: I swear, everyone at NYU is gay.
NYU bimbette #2: Oh, I know exactly what you mean.
NYU bimbette #1: No, I mean, like, everybody — like 40 percent.

–Veselka, 9th St & 2nd Ave

Overheard by: Bean

Posted on January 17, 2019
Bimbettes, Gays and Lesbians, Restaurants & Cafes, Students, Stupidity

With More Sodomy, or Less?

Student #1: It’s crazy to think the pope was part of the Hitler youth.
Student #2: Not really — the Hitler youth was like the YMCA of Germany.

–Van crossing GW Bridge

Posted on January 15, 2019
Comebacks, Compare/Contrast, Global Geography, Hitler/Nazis, Pope, Students, Washington Heights and Inwood

Because People Who Are Good at Math Are Always the Slowest to Catch On

Student #1: How could you throw a ball 520 meters? That's like half a mile!
Student #2 (from back of room): You know what else is half a mile?
(students all laugh)
Teacher: What? How come everyone got it except for me?

–Bronx HS of Science

Overheard by: Lillian

Posted on January 4, 2019
Bronx Science, Compare/Contrast, Height, Penis, Questions, Sex, Sports, Students, Teachers/Professors, The Bronx

What About Janet Reno Then, Smart Guy?

Student: Yes, but I feel that Robert was a boy while Mr Pontellier was a man.
Professor: Hm, yes, but I'm going to argue that they both had penises and were therefore both men.

–Queens College

Posted on December 31, 2018
Age/Aging, Compare/Contrast, Penis, Queens College, School and studying, Students, Teachers/Professors

Ask Me about the Three-Hour Orgasms Some Time

Professor: When I try to remember the last time I felt chaos around me, I can only think of September 11th. Were you guys around for that?
Student: You must do a lot of yoga.
Professor: Actually, I do.

–Eugene Lang College, the New School

Posted on December 30, 2018
College, Students, Talking/Convos, Teachers/Professors, Terrorism, Yoga

Hmm, Yours Don’t Drag on the Ground the Way Mine Do

Chick #1: So, you transferred to CUNY-Hunter?
Chick #2: Yeah. My last school was making me stupid and drunk, and I can’t be a lawyer like that… Look at you, little big knuckles!

–Q train