Guy with curly black hair: I’m not Jewish!
Friend: Sure you are — you have Bob Dylan hair.
–Stuyvesant High
Overheard by: It Takes A Lot to Laugh, It Takes a Train to Stereotype
Guy with curly black hair: I’m not Jewish!
Friend: Sure you are — you have Bob Dylan hair.
–Stuyvesant High
Overheard by: It Takes A Lot to Laugh, It Takes a Train to Stereotype
Employee: The manager made us open the doors, but we don’t have shit. Nothing is ready. [A bunch of employees are frantically putting buns on trays and trays into machines.]Drunk guy, leaning on counter: I want some McGriddles! [Slips and falls.]Employee: Look at you — you can’t even keep your shit from falling over! … If you sue us, I’m going to say you was drunk.
Drunk guy, thoughtfully: You’re right… I’m going to sue you for eight McGriddles!
–McDonald’s, Fulton & Cliff St
Hobo: Yo, man, let me get a bite of that!
Guy eating cheesesteak: Naw, man!
Hobo: Dayummmn… Well, you ain’t gotta eat it that fast!
–Lafayette & Broadway
Security guy: Where you from?
Tourist: Amsterdam.
Security guy, gesturing broadly to the view: This was once all yours!
–Empire State Building
Guy: Daaamn, you da prettiest girl I seen all month. Come over here an’ talk to me.
Chick: Oh?
Guy: Shit, I’ma call you ‘Miss September.’
–151 Amsterdam
Overheard by: craps under my window
Cashier #1: Ugh, I can’t stand Muhammad.
Cashier #2: I don’t mind him. He dumb.
–Duane Reade, 49th & 9th
Nerd chick: So, are you gonna see Ahmadinejad speak today, or go to the rally or anything?
Bimbette: Nah… I thought maybe I would, but then I realized I could totally just wait ’til it comes out on YouTube or whatever. It’s like, why even bother?
–Barnard College
Overheard by: Vicksburg
Five-year-old boy pointing at large statue of naked man: Look how small his whizzer is, Mommy!
Mother: It’s not nice to point, Jake.
Five-year-old boy: But he’s not a real person… Look how small it is!
–Time Warner Center Mall
Woman: Do you smell that? That’s the smell of crime and corruption.
Man: That’s the smell of my underwear.
–Union Square
Mother: Put your shirt back on, or I won’t take you bowling.
Son: Am I funny, Mom?
Mother: No, honey, you’re strange… like that homeless man there.
–14th & Broadway
Overheard by: Ed
