Fashionista #1: Did you do your laundry yet?
Fashionista #2: Yeah, I used a service called the Laundry Spa, it’s like they gave a facial to my cashmere sweater.
Fashionista #1: Wow, I have a pair of jeans that could really use a facial.
–Bleecker off 11th street
Overheard by: L Cohen
HS girl: OK, OK, I got it. This will solve everyone’s problems: Jamal, you need to eat Anna out.
–Union Square
Chick: So, I’m smart, right? I mean, I consider myself smarter than the average woman. So I go to this interview, and they give me this test, a long test like the SATs. And I’m drunk. So I get a call later, “Sorry, you didn’t do as well as we’d hoped.”
–F train
Girl #1: You should look at profiles with me. It’s like shopping.
Girl #2: Yeah, it’s like “Would this one look good on me?”
–Dive 75, UWS
Woman: Excuse me. I have to put something in my dryer.
Girl folding clothes: Oh, okay.
Woman: Excuse me! I have to put something else in my dryer.
Girl: O-kay…
Woman: Now I have to take something out of my dryer…unbelievable.
Girl: Wow, you’re a case!
Woman: I’m a what?!
Girl: A case. I’ve never seen anybody so worked up over laundry.
Woman: Well, you haven’t lived very long, have you?
Girl: Not as long as you!…Have a nice day!
Woman: Fuck you!
–York Launderette, York Avenue and E. 82nd
Girl #1: Oh my God, don’t we know him?
Girl #2: Duh, that’s Crotchman.
Girl #1: Riiight. From that party.
Girl #2: Yeah.
–Penn Station
Chick: One time I saw this old guy fall and drop his cane onto the subway tracks, and it was raining, so we tried to talk people into giving him their umbrella, since he couldn’t get the cane–and we were so mad when no one would give us an umbrella, ’cause you can’t just buy a cane at Duane Reade.
–6 train
Overheard by: Todd Seavey
Chick: When I first got here from Jersey, I thought I’d let it all out, live my own life, but I quickly realized that was a bad idea.
–Blue Ribbon Sushi, Soho
Overheard by: Abby
Law Student: The Nation is too conservative for her.
–Fordham Law
Overheard by: Patrick Smith
Guy: Where do you live again?
Girl: Right over there.
Guy: Can I walk you home?
Girl: But it’s right over there…
–Orchard Street
Girl on phone: I forget what the BD stands for, but I’m pretty sure the SM stand for sado-masochism. My ad was in the platonic section, anyway.
–60th & Columbus
Overheard by: Alaska
