Chick about cute guy standing: So, his penis… Big, small, doody ball?
Queer: Umm… It's good…slightly larger than doody ball.
Chick: Oh…good.
–Q Train
Overheard by: ShayaKNYC
Chick about cute guy standing: So, his penis… Big, small, doody ball?
Queer: Umm… It's good…slightly larger than doody ball.
Chick: Oh…good.
–Q Train
Overheard by: ShayaKNYC
20-something Long Island girl: Oh god! This breakup has been the best thing that has ever happened to me. I honestly don't even care that he dumped me.
Friend: Yeah, totally.
20-something Long Island girl: Seriously, he needs to realize if it wasn't for that sweater he was wearing, and the fact that I was on ecstasy that night, we would have never dated for this long.
Friend: Yeah! It was J.Crew… And they were double stacked…you were powerless.
–Lokal Bar, Greenpoint, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Aaron
Seven-year-old girl to her mom: I have more jewelry than you! I have more jewelry than you!
Mother: Like many things in life, this is not a competition.
Girl: Of course it's a competition!
–West Broadway & Broome Street, SoHo
Overheard by: And I thought people would be quoting me…
Teen girl #1: So yeah, like…Paris Hilton totally got kicked out of our school for doing coke too!
Teen girl #2: Paris Hilton went to our school?!
Teen girl #1: Bitch, this isn't about Paris… All I can say is: How cool is it that I got kicked out of the same school as Paris Hilton did, for the same reason?
Teen girl #2: Wait, you got kicked out?
Teen girl #1: Why the fuck do you think I'm not in class anymore?
Teen girl #2: Everyone thought you were pregnant again.
–Park Bench, 89 & CPW
Chick: Her Facebook picture is her double-fisting two beer bottles.
Queer: Oh, please. You know they were originally two cocks and she Photoshopped them out.
–House party, 172 & Broadway
Overheard by: Well-dressed Indian boy
Girl: She wants me to make a distribution e-mail for four people!
Gay: You better do it.
Girl: Or what? They'll take away my blow-up Statue of Liberty desk statue?
–6 Train
Girl to boy squeezing her boobs: Oh, you are cruising for a bruising.
Boy: Haha, like the one I gave you on the kitchen table this morning?
Girl: (laughs)
Boy (suddenly serious): Man, I hope nobody ate off of that.
–Pier 11
Overheard by: mentally reviewing everyplace I ate
Little girl: Please?
Father: I'm not paying attention to you.
Little girl: Pleeeeeeease? Do you want me to cry? I'll cry. Do you want me to cry, daddy? (holds up stuffed owl) Just get this for me and I'll be happy, please?
–Gift Shop, Museum of Natural History
Hobo ringing bells: La laaaa lalala mmmmmmdooodaaaa.
Loud girl: Oh my god, a Hare Krishna!
–14th & Broadway
Girl #1: How much is a train ride?
Girl #2 (in disbelief): Two dollars.
Girl #1: Well, I don't know these things. I'm from Jersey.
Girl #2: Shhhhhhhhhhhh!
–A Train
Overheard by: It's okay, we knew you were Jersey
