Put away your skewer jokes — we’ve posted a new contest! Click here to read the entry and submit your headline. The winner of Monday’s contest will be posted this coming Monday.
Winners of this and future contests will get a copy of the book Overheard in New York, signed by Morgan Friedman (until we run out).
Fruit stand guy: Too much papaya! Too much marijuana! Too much cocaine!
–Dean & Court, Cobble Hill
Overheard by: Zach
Asian girl: You’re not following the diet plan! It’s either junk food or no food!
–Stuyvesant High School
Man: Ay, Mami, looking good today…
Woman: Can’t you see I am with my son?
Little boy: You’re his mommy too?
–14th & 3rd
Overheard by: Constantino
Girl #1: So this guy I work with has been hitting on me a lot lately.
Girl #2: Is he Mexican?
Girl #1: No…he’s black or white or something.
–The Cutting Room, West 24th Street
Overheard by: Kate Elizabeth Queram
Hispanic/black mom: Do you believe that shit? I was like, “You have got to be messin.'”
7-year-old daughter: Ya, I hope you told him.
Mom: Ya, I gave yo’ daddy some shit. He ain’t gonna come round no mo’.
–Water & Fulton
Overheard by: Fabiani
Professor guy: What was the number one cause of death for pioneer women in the 1800s?
Chick: Beauty.
–Touro College Women’s Division, Lexington Avenue
Sidewalk solicitor, eagerly carrying clipboard: Would you please help the…
Pitch target: No spam! (walks away briskly, not looking back)
–7th Ave
College girl to friend: Tonight’s goal is to make out with a cokehead.
–7th St
Woman looking at statue: Did Columbus even make it to Manhattan?
–Columbus Circle
Tourist guy: Lots of people, smells really bad… It’s just like I always imagined.
–Times Square
Overheard by: Lauren
Hipster #1: I’m really into Bossa Nova.
Hipster #2: I like her, too! What was the name of her hit song? The one that goes [starts humming]
–Yuppietown
