Wednesday One-Liners Have a Doctor’s Note

Chick to another: She’s a weed-smoking, modern orthodox girl. I mean, I don’t think she goes to her rabbi’s high, but…

–Brooklyn Museum

Overheard by: cole

Professor: … So the art department on the set just smokes pot all day and paints blue boulders.

–Media Productions class, City College

Mini thug: Yo, I wouldn’t even have to be high out of my mind to enjoy this shit!

–Brooklyn Cyclone, Coney Island

Overheard by: Alie

Smoking model on cell: Um, yeah, he’s cute… But, duh — he’s addicted to opiates!

–Houston & Laffayette

Overheard by: Jake

Hobo to girls: How are you smiling in a city filled with a million crackheads?

–56th & 5th

Guy on a rant in front of Imagine mosaic: In my next life I want to be an amoeba! Make more music, smoke more pot… Eating healthily is expensive! We should all have 40 acres and a mule and start all over!

–Strawberry Fields, Central Park

Overheard by: I’ll have what he’s having

Posted on August 22, 2007
All Wednesday One-Liners, Animals & Nature, Arts & Letters, Beauty, Cocaine, Compliments, Food, Gripes, Judaism, Money & Class, Movies, Music, Psychic, Questions, Science, Wednesday One-Liners, Wednesday One-Liners Vary, Weed, Weirdness, Wishes & desires

Clearly You’ve Never Seen a Cow Do a Beer-Bong

Drunk chick: Oh my god! Is AOL ‘America online’?
Friend: Ummm, yes.
Drunk chick: Holy crap!
Friend: What did you think it was?
Drunk chick: Who the fuck are you? And why do you want to sell me something, you dirty sloot?
Friend: I’m your friend, and you’re drunk.
Drunk chick: I am as sober as a cow.
Friend: What the hell?
Drunk chick: What does AOL stand for?

–Grand Central

Overheard by: noelle

Posted on August 17, 2007
Drunks, Grand Central, Questions

I’ll Check the Marriage License When I Get Home

Girlfriend: What was the name of that girl?
Boyfriend: Who?
Girlfriend: The one that was totally in love with you?
Boyfriend: Yeah, she was awesome.
Girlfriend: Who?
Boyfriend: No idea.

–Bergen & Flatbush, Brooklyn

Posted on August 13, 2007
Brooklyn, Couples, Questions

If You Must Sleep with Your Boyfriend, We Recommend Macy’s

Preppy girl #1: Are these boyfriend panties, or are these cheating-on-your-boyfriend panties?
Preppy girl #2: I think they’re a little slutty.
Preppy girl #1: So, for cheating?
Preppy girl #2: Yeah.
Preppy girl #1: Do you think this is all they have, or is there another drawer?

–Victoria’s Secret