20-something guy #1: So would you fuck Oprah?
20-something guy #2: What? No. Why?
20-something guy #1: Well, I thought you might. Cause you like black chicks, right? And you like fat chicks…I thought you'd be down for a fat black chick.
20-something guy #2: Hell no. You gotta keep the fat ones white.
–C Train
Overheard by: So make sure to wash them with bleach.
Jersey man, describing doughnuts to his daughter: And this one has so much chocolate…so much chocolate it will turn your skin brown!
Brown-skinned employee: Um, that's not true.
Jersey man: Look at this guy! He used to be Swedish!
–The Doughnut Plant
Big black guy selling CDs: Hey, pretty lady…you like black people?
Girl: No.
Black guy: That's so cold.
Girl's friend, whispering loudly: Did you just say no? He's going to shoot you.
–Herald Square
Overheard by: i dont like them either
Black guy holding form: Name? I don't have a name.
Chinese guy, pumping fist in air: Obama! Obama! Obama!
–Bowery & Bayard
Black thug to friend: Yo, everyone's Irish on St. Patrick's day.
Drunk white girl: Is everyone black on Martin Luther King day?
–5th Ave & 49th St
Conductor: If you see something, say something.
Crazy fat lady reading book: Mind your own business, don't say anything. (a few minutes later) I don't wanna be no Asian, I don't wanna be the size of no Asian.
–Downtown A train
Girl #1: The Wiz is so much better than The Wizard of Oz!
Girl #2: That's 'cause there ain't no white people in it.
Girl #1: True…true.
–57th & 6th
Overheard by: Ross
Crazy old black dude: I never heard of a white Taliban CIA.
Crazy young black dude: Yeah?
Crazy old black dude: Yeah. But now you know they out there.
–J Train
Overheard by: *c
Physics teacher: So the formula for work is w = fd, or force times displacement.
Student #1: How are we supposed to remember that?
Student #2: “Fd”–“first dog”! Like Obama!
Student #3: W = fd, White House's first dog!
–Stuyvesant High School
Black woman in line for bus: I was in line first! This isn't fair! I was here before any of you!
Suit: Relax, Rosa Parks, you'll get on the bus.
–86th & Lexington
