Girl #1: That was really fun. We should do it again really soon.
Girl #2: Okay, great! Like when?
Girl #1: I dunno. I was just sayin’.
–13th St
Overheard by: Jordan Green
Girl #1: That was really fun. We should do it again really soon.
Girl #2: Okay, great! Like when?
Girl #1: I dunno. I was just sayin’.
–13th St
Overheard by: Jordan Green
Woman: So the subway in Abu Dhabi is pretty convenient?
Man: Yeah, but the only thing I don’t understand is how they can put a subway on an island.
Woman, after a long pause: Think about it.
–1 train, Christopher St
Tourist: I want to have sex. I’m old enough!
–Outside Cold Stone Creamery, 42nd St
20-Something frat boy: Ya know, something tells me my wife hasn’t even been born yet…
–6 train, Astor Place
Overheard by: Al
Young woman: If I were a pedophile, I would be the best pedophile ever because nobody would suspect me!
–6 train
Overheard by: Innocent bystander
Man, trying on glasses: No, these make me look like a pedophile.
–9th Street Optical, 9th St between 5th & 6th, Brooklyn
Chick on cell: Yes, I got fired at my job! Yes, I got fired at Barely Legal! I got tired of playing Twister in my pajamas.
–Airplane, LaGuardia Tarmac
Overheard by: Judy
Mandy Moore: So, what’s the plan for the party?
Publicist: So, I was thinking, you show up at the party, right? And they check your name or whatever, and then, get this, a clown escorts you to your table.
Mandy Moore: A clown?
Publicist: I know, right?
–Elevator, The Archive Building, Greenwich & Christopher
Mother: See, it says these are endangered deer from China.
Tween daughter: I guess they are from China. Look at their slanty eyes!
–Bronx Zoo
Overheard by: Nina Drummond
Guy: I can’t stand these people who friend everybody in the class of 2010 on Facebook.
Girl: Ugh, I know. Some girl who does that told me my photos made her cry a little.
–Astor Place
Overheard by: Michelle
Slutty girl: My high school history teacher ate my pussy. Then the science teacher. He ate my pussy. Then in college my freshman philosophy professor and my junior year economics professor, they ate my pussy.
Practical girl: You need to put out a Zagat guide to your twat.
–Prince & Broadway
Overheard by: PDJ
Girl: Isn’t your dad Swiss?
Guy: No, he’s Swedish.
Girl: Oh, that’s right: people are Swedish, things are Swiss. Well, actually, they’re interchangeable.
–Sprint Store, 8th St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Thunder
Girl #1: My mother is friends with tons of socialites.
Girl #2: Well my father fucked Madonna.
Girl #1: You win.
–6th & Bedford
Club kid #1: Yeah, we should make our own clothes, but we need to learn to make patterns.
Club kid #2: My grandma used to know how, but now she has Alzheimer’s.
Clubkid #1: That should make her designs more creative!
–7th St & 1st Ave
Overheard by: Mark
