Suit: I read that they’re gonna be replaced by robots soon. A robot’s not gonna complain about pension.
–4 train
Overheard by: Charles
Suit: I read that they’re gonna be replaced by robots soon. A robot’s not gonna complain about pension.
–4 train
Overheard by: Charles
White girl: Hey, what are your pants made of? They’re really shiny.
Asian guy: Oh, that’s probably the grease from all the food I eat. I eat a lot of greasy food. Oh, and soy milk. I spilled soy milk on myself; I “soyled” myself.
–6 train
Overheard by: LiAps
Guy #1: So did you get to see him this weekend?
Guy #2: Yeah, but we were clothed.
–6 train
Girl #1: Why do I always have camel toe?
Girl #2: Are you buying your pants too tight?
Girl #1: No, I think I gained weight.
Girl #2: Where, in your labia?
–E train
Woman: C’mon, please move into the train.
Guy: Would you like to crawl into my asshole?
–1 train, 34th Street station
Girl on cell: Yo, I had the illest diarrhea yesterday!
–7 train
Woman: Don’t buy me no jewelry that’s on TV, Nigga! What’re you talking about?
–1/9 train
Guy: Yo, the 1/9 train always smells like ass! I think it’s the fragrance they use.
–1 train
Man: Sir, you’re not suppose to smoke on the train.
Hobo: What? Are you the Marshall? I’m a crack dealer, I sell crack. What you gonna do, steal my money?
–1 train
Conductor: This is a Manhattan bound N train. The next stop is Grand Avenue.
Guy #1: Ha, ha, ha! Yo, listen up! Darth Vada’s running da train!
Guy #2: Dat’s some funny shit, man.
–N train
