Portly dude in Rangers jersey: I’m the best thing to ever happen to Amish country.
–Spanish Consulate, 58th & Lex
Portly dude in Rangers jersey: I’m the best thing to ever happen to Amish country.
–Spanish Consulate, 58th & Lex
Skinny JAP: Omgosh! Let’s go watch the World Cup! Like, we’ll see witchcraft…magic…stuff.
Fat JAP: Oh yeah, totally. That stuff from Harry Potter.
–Greenwich & North Moore
Overheard by: Alyson Leigh
Guy #1: My ass is killing me.
Guy #2: Really? Mine feels alright.
Guy #1: Well, you weren’t doing what I was doing all day. It feels like someone ripped my ass off and stapled it back on.
–Paragon Sporting Goods, 17th & Broadway
Overheard by: ericaS
Kid: Excuse me, can you get Floyd to sign something for me?
Security guard: No. Floyd hates kids.
–Shea Stadium
Overheard by: Silent K
Very fat guy: I’ve gained about 20 pounds since the last time you saw me.
Skinny guy: Yeah, I’d like to talk to you about that. When we’re not on the subway, though, okay?
–2 train
Yuppie mom: Do you think my baby is old enough to do yoga?
–Union & Henry, Red Hook
Pregnant woman on cell: Mom, I gotta go. I can’t find Jason and I need to take him home before he plays Hide and Go Soil Yourself behind the stuffer machine.
–Build-A-Bear, 5th & 46th
Overheard by: Anna Lindgren
Man on bike: I seem [pause] to have misplaced [pause] my fudge.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Lane & Oliver
Guy: Are you going to the gym after this?
Girl: Are you going to the mean house?
Guy: That was, without a doubt, the lamest comeback I have ever heard in my life.
–Fordham University, Rose Hill
Overheard by: Jessica R
Guy: Yeah, it’s like all three of our neurons are coming together right now.
–Hunter College
Overheard by: Phe
Store guy: Ha! Nice scooter.
Girl: At least I don’t work at Foot Locker, asshole.
Store guy: At least I don’t wear plaid and play lesbian softball.
–Delancey & Allen
