Chick: So do you wear briefs or boxers?
Dude: You mean panties?
Chick: No, you know, briefs.
Dude: Boxers. I wear boxers. Adult males don’t wear panties. Panties are for girls.
Chick: Why you call ’em panties?
Dude: That’s what we call ’em in jail.
–Hudson & Charleton
Receptionist lady: Don’t you be sayin’ my whole name; I’m on America’s Most Wanted!
–NewYork-Presbyterian Hospital, West 168th Street
Overheard by: supermerm
Dowager: Today was the first day I took a Celebrex since the pogo stick thing.
–Park & 60th
Overheard by: Frank Laser
Hobo: Yeah man, that’s good shit. Except for those white-ass American bandstand drummers. Whoever heard of fucking Clark Kent playing bongos?
–55th & 9th
Overheard by: Luke Reynolds
Girl on cell: Oh my God, I am like so uncoherent today.
–Washington Square Park
Overheard by: Athens Mol
Mother: Hmm…remind me to make a stop at The Home Depot on the way home. Your father said he needed a stripper to remove some paint.
–59th & Lexington
Girl on cell: …And I was like, “Good thing you think I’m pregnant.”
–Penn Station
Overheard by: Halcyon Murphy
Girl: If anybody is gonna bring back the cape it will probably be a
lesbian.
–Borders, Time Warner Center
Hobo: Nickel? Dime?
Yuppie guy: I can’t hear you, asshole.
–Horatio & Eighth
Guy #1: You know the reason why human beings are not at the top of the food chain?
Guy #2: What?
Guy #1: Pez.
–Washington Square Park
