Dude #1: So, you want to hear about my trip to Miami?
Dude #2: Yeah, why not — just let me order a bottle of J.D. first, then it will get really interesting!
Dude #1: Yeah, fuck Miami, let’s get dead drunk and plan a murder.
Dude #2: Seriously, who do you have to fuck to get drunk around here?
–Double Seven Bar, 418 W 14th St
Mom to three-year-old: Actually, there are two other airports in New York. One is called ‘JFK,’ and the other is called ‘New Jersey.’
–111th & Broadway
Overheard by: Fudd
Drunk girl: Well, somebody’s walking back to Jersey tonight!
–Times Square
Man on cell: Well, you’re really going to have to gather whatever inner strength you’ve got, look inside yourself, stay strong… Be prepared to live without me around… Huh? New Jersey! What did you think I meant?
–42nd & 5th
Overheard by: Matthew K. Johnson
Guy on cell: She’s moving to Israel? Really? I guess people really will do anything to get out of New Jersey.
–Park Slope
Woman on cell: No, you see, this guy was a Jersey guy. He might have made it big on Wall Street, but he’s a Jersey guy. That was a mistake.
–Battery Park
Guy #1: It could be worse.
Guy #2: Worse? How?
Guy #1: Newark.
Guy #2: Newark… Right. I see your point.
–Duane Reade, 8th & Broadway
Drunk girl: I look like a Halloween movie — like Freddie the 13th. Wait, that’s not right.
–PATH train
Overheard by: Juggs Photographer
30-something woman: I’ve come to realize that there’s never going to be a Lloyd Dobbler. There won’t be any boom boxes.
–Prospect Park
Hushed female voice during screening of Short Bus: What the fuck does this have to do with hooking up in New York post-9/11? Take this hippie-dippy crap back to Portland! Ewww! God, take your carriage clock and shove it!
–Landmark Sunshine Theatre, Houston St
Middle-aged tourist to husband: They are so dramatic with all of the security here… It’s just like a movie.
–Church St, by World Trade Center
UPS Guy: I swear to you, Joey, I seen a lot of movies in my time and this movie is not to be missed. I swear, it’s definitely one of the ten best I’ve ever seen. And I’m a big movie buff. They have it at Blockbuster — you have to rent it. It’s called Nanny McPhee. You got that? Nanny McPhee.
–34th & Broadway
Woman: It’s like watching The Sound of Music and The Exorcist at the same time!
–Starbucks, Financial District
Overheard by: Sarah
Guy: That movie had more male pube shots in it than any movie I’ve ever seen.
–Starbucks, 66th & Columbus
Overheard by: MojoSaves
Thug in Navigator: Hey! Where’s Brooklyn Bridge at from here?
Guy in car: Uhhh…
Queer in back seat: You’re asking three white guys in a Connecticut car? Fuck! You ain’t gonna make it.
–Flatbush Ave, off the BQE
Overheard by: TK, third guy from CT who didn’t know either
Clerk: Australia… is that here or is that one of those France places?
–Utica and Atlantic, Brooklyn
Overheard by: Keith
JAP: Then we went to Florence, and after that to the seacoast around Genoa, all these little towns — I think it’s called the Geneva Convention.
–Hip coffee shop, 71 Irving Place
JAP: So where exactly is New England? Is it in Europe?
–Duane Reade
Tourist chick, pointing far away: That’s Manhattan, right?
–Observatory, Empire State Building
Overheard by: kaja
Guy to friends: Wait, are you sure we’re not in Boston?
–86th and Park Ave.
Tourist to her family, pointing at City Hall: I’m not sure what that building is, but I’m going to guess it’s the French Embassy.
–Next to the gates outside City Hall
Girl: Mom, where is Viagra Falls?
–Central Park
Overheard by: Delilah
Guy #1: I mean, who is impressed by knowing all the state capitals? That’s easy. I can name every state capital.
Guy #2: Vermont.
Guy #1: Huh?
Guy #2: What’s the capital of Vermont?
Guy #1: That’s not a state.
–N train
Overheard by: JY
Older gentleman: So where is it you’re from?
Young lady: California, near San Francisco.
Older gentleman: Ah, the windy city.
–Elevator at Wall St. Plaza
Overheard by: Just a temp
Ghetto girl #1: Yo, I been to a lot of ghettos and shit, but I ain’t never goin’ to Compton.
Ghetto girl #2: Mhm. Word, yo.
Suit: NWA, yo. Straight outta Compton!
–6 train, Hunter College station
Overheard by: not going to compton anytime soon
Queer #1: Ann and Leslie are here.
Queer #2: Shit, are they lesbians?
Queer #1: Yeah.
Queer #2: Uh, I’m a D.C. gay. I don’t hang out with lesbians.
–3rd & B
