Fratboy: The cute Asian girl. You know how everyone has a nickname? That’s hers: the cute Asian girl. And she always smells so good!
–Joe’s Pizza, Carmine St.
Fratboy: The cute Asian girl. You know how everyone has a nickname? That’s hers: the cute Asian girl. And she always smells so good!
–Joe’s Pizza, Carmine St.
Girl #1: We were late ’cause he was looking at himself. Just looking at himself. I go in, and he’s checking himself in the mirror, making faces, and I get all mad at him, and he’s like, ‘What?!’
Girl #2: He must be really into himself. Men don’t do that.
Girl #1: He is good-looking, though.
–6 Train
Dad to whiny three-year-old daughter: And now you're going to try and manipulate me by crying.
–186th St & Ft. Washington Ave
Girl to friends: That's just the way the world is. You don't see me cryin' whenever someone calls me a fat bitch or a short bitch or an ugly bitch…
–23rd & 8th
15-year-old boy: Yo, I'd cry if that happened to me, but I'm just sensitive like that.
–A Train
Overheard by: pop pop
Girl: And then you know I take out my yo-yo and start dancing. And then you know I'm multi-tasking! I'm yo-yoing, dancing and crying all at the same time!
–LaGuardia High School
Woman on cell: Alex, stop crying. Stop crying. What about the breadsticks, were there at least breadsticks?
–34th & 6th
Harried-looking maid of honor: You make the most beautiful blushing bride!
Bridezilla: I'm not blushing! I have rosacea!
–Ladies Room, Tavern On The Green
Overheard by: Really was blushing…
Construction worker #1: I swear, man, it don't matter if you look like Brad fucking Pitt–if you ain't hung, you ain't getting any.
Construction worker #2: (sadly nods)
–43rd & 6th
Girl #1: Look at that guy in the gray suit.
Girl #2: My sister knows him.
Girl #1: He's cute, what does he do?
Girl #2: I think he is a social worker.
Girl #1: Ah–full heart, empty wallet. (chuckles)
Girl #2: Oh man, that's cold.
Girl #1 (looking at girl #2 with surprise): What? if a certain lifestyle is important to you…we shouldn't pretend it isn't. I'm not kidding myself anymore.
–Central Park
Overheard by: Darren
JAP #1: Oh my god! I have such a crush on this guy, except he's not cute, at all.
JAP #2: So, you like his personality then?
JAP #1: No.
JAP #2: Oh.
JAP #1: He just has a really great fashion sense.
–Cosi, E 8th St
Man in elevator on cell: Yeah. That's what I'm paying for, right? Next time just make sure it's a male to female.
–Elevator, Chelsea
Staten Island man to son: Okay, you have to be careful here. And don't touch any of the pretty ladies: the prettier they are, the more likely it's a man.
–1st & Houston
Middle aged woman to friend: Every morning I wake up and think I look more and more like Mrs Doubtfire.
–Union Square
Overheard by: mk
Guy in pink spandex to Victorian Gardens employee: Excuse me, where do the trannies hang out?
–Central Park
Preppy chick to friends: Did I ever tell you guys about the tranny I slept with?
–19th St & 6th Ave
Overheard by: Well-Dressed Indian Boy
Mom, in motherly voice, to crying four-year-old: Aww, what's the matter, did the little transvestite scare you?
–2nd & 72nd
Overheard by: Nancy
Girl: How was your date last night?
Guy: He had a sick body but an ugly face. I slept with him anyway.
–84th St & 2nd Ave
Fat guy: Just because you’re cute doesn’t mean you’re powerful.
Cute bartender: Oh yes it does!
–Mercury Bar, 9th Ave between 45th & 46th
Overheard by: derek rose
