Beauty

Straight boy to group of girls: Hey, what are you guys talking about?
Girl #1: Are you sure you want to know?
Boy: Yes.
Girl #2: We're talking about hot gay guys.
(other girls laugh)
Girl #3: Do you think Jonathan Groff is hot?
(straight boy leaves)

–Bard High School, Queens

Overheard by: Sunny

Lady #1: This stuff is really good. It has antidotes in it. It’s good for your skin.
Lady #2: You mean ANTIOXIDANTS. An ANTIDOTE is a short story.

–Barnes & Noble

Girl in short skirt: Hey, that hobo just whistled at me!
Girl in tight pants: Ohmigod, he totally whistled at me like five minutes ago!
Girl in short skirt: Maybe he has something caught in his throat?
Girl in tight pants: No, I think were just really hot.

–Pond Bench, Central Park

Overheard by: A Person with Ears

Guy #1: So, Martha Stewart got out of jail today.
Guy #2: Yeah, she looks kinda hot…it must have been all the weightlifting!

–Pa Kua Martial Arts, 38th & 6th

Hipster #1: Man, she is so hot.
Hipster #2: Oh yeah.
Hipster #1: But sometimes she looks like a guy.
Hipster #2: True.

–Outside Shea Stadium

Guy #1: Hey, that girl’s pretty cute.
Guy #2: Yeah, except the hat is kind of Inspector Gadget.
Guy #1: Yeah, or Peter Sellers. She’s got kind of a Peter Sellers look going on.
Guy #2: “I love the way you look like Peter Sellers… but hot.”

–6 Train

Law student to little girl with pink balloon dog: I really like your balloon! It's so pretty!
Girl's dad: What do you say?
Little girl: Woof woof!

–79th & 2nd

20-ish girl: Dammit, why aren’t you coming to my party?
20-ish guy: I told you — I have to go to DC that night with my family.
20-ish girl: How am I going to show off my terribly attractive boyfriend to all my other less-attractive boyfriends if you’re not going to be there?!

–L train

Trendy teen girl #1: You know, it’s like a fat girl who has a really pretty face…
Trendy teen girl #2: Oh my god, I hate that!

–Tribeca

One of three Abercrombie zombies: So, which of us do you think is the prettiest?
Cute Czech immigrant: You all look the same.

–L train

Overheard by: spazzoid