Girl on date: If nothing else, I have morals!
Guy on date: You have dumbness.
–Local, 53rd & 2nd
Girl on date: If nothing else, I have morals!
Guy on date: You have dumbness.
–Local, 53rd & 2nd
Guy: Thanks, ma’am.
Teenage cashier: Did he just call me “ma’am?”? Do I look like a ma’am? I don’t look that old, do I?
Guy: No, no; “ma’am” is a sign of respect, not age.
Teenage cashier: Okay, then.
Guy: Uh, thanks, hot mama.
Teenage cashier: Did he just call me “hot mama”?
–Gourmet Garage, Broadway
Overheard by: Duncan Pflaster
Preteen thug to friend: Yo, nigga! What's crackin'?
Passing suit: Your voice.
Thug's friend: Oh, snap!
–Fulton St. & John St.
Overheard by: Annie B
White guy: Baby, do you know how much I love you? (rubs the most sensitive part of her eye)
Asian woman: (long pause)
White guy: Did you hear me?
Asian woman: Okay… You know what? I love affection, but I am not getting any younger and you're making my crow's foot worse!
–F Train
Overheard by: BJ
Hobo: Can you spare some change?
White girl: What? Why don’t you ask anyone else around here? What is this, “Ask the White Girl Day”?
–Bushwick
Guy #1: You know, you never would have even heard of Halloween if I hadn’t told you about it.
Guy #2: Whatever.
–9th Ave & 15th St
Overheard by: Don Willmott
Woman in stall to sneezing woman: God bless you.
Sneezing woman: I'm atheist!
–Public Bathroom, 34th St & Broadway
Overheard by: smal
Queer: I do Pilates now!
Girl: Jesus Christ, you are such a homo.
–Bryant Park
Tourist lady: So, this is New York…
Chick: No. This is Manhattan.
–R train
Overheard by: miraclemidgit
Street preacher: You need the blood! The blood of Jesus!
Crazy hobo: You need a good butt fucking! Right in the mouth!
–Union Square
